私の物語

Happy Chinese New Year

2012-01-26T15:34:00.002+08:00

Today is the 4th day of Chinese New Year
Perhaps it's a bit late to greet at this time?
Well, maybe... but it's never too late
Been very busy with work throughout the eve, 1st and 2nd day of Chinese New Year
Glad that I manage to get all the work done and start enjoying my holiday from the 3rd day
And on the 4th day, I'm here in Singapore...
As usual, I'm here to pay my grandmother a visit
Have been back from Dubai for around a week
And there's a lot of things happening in these few days
Need some time to digest and catch up with it
And because of me falling sick on the week before Chinese New Year
And some business trip and mountains of workload
My life starts to get a little mess up
Hopefully once everything slowly restoring back to normal
I will be able to start living my life again...
It's been awhile for me to play my guitar
It's been awhile for me to write something
It's been awhile for me to take some photographs
Still got another week of holiday, although I still need to go back to my office in Malaysia
But still I hope I can take some time to rest well and recharge myself
And hopefully I'll be able to start moving forward to chase my goals and dream again

蘇打綠 – 你在煩惱什麼

2012-01-15T12:37:00.003+08:00

沒有不會謝的花

沒有不會退的浪

沒有不會暗的光

你在煩惱什麼嗎?

沒有不會淡的疤

沒有不會好的傷

沒有不會停下來的絕望

你在憂鬱什麼啊

時間從來不回答

生命從來不喧嘩

就算只有片刻我也不害怕

是片刻組成永恆啊…

沒有不會謝的花

沒有不會退的浪

沒有不會暗的光

你在煩惱什麼嗎?

沒有不會淡的疤

沒有不會好的傷

沒有不會停下來的絕望

你在憂鬱什麼啊

時間從來不回答

生命從來不喧嘩

就算只有片刻我也不害怕

是片刻組成永恆啊…

時間從來不回答

生命從來不喧嘩

就算只有片刻我也不害怕

片刻組成永恆啊……

就算只有片刻我也不害怕

片刻組成永恆啊……

It's been awhile...

2012-01-14T21:24:00.001+08:00

Yup, it's been awhile since my last posting
Have been very busy recently with tons of work
And at the same time have been sick for 3 days for now
Seems like food poisoning or something... anyway, it's getting better slowly
One more week to go before Chinese New Year
This is the first time in my life that I feel so eager to go home for celebration
It may seems to be ironic, after all I'm the one who always said I'm used to be alone
Yes, I'm used to it. Indeed.
After all this while I have been thinking a lot...
In the end, I think I figure it out.
I still don't like to be alone, even if I'm used to it or what so ever
Maybe it's about time that I realize something which I should have realized long ago
Yes, I'm glad that another piece of puzzle has been solved
Still there are some thinking to do, and hopefully I can really sort things out
Questions which are still awaiting answers to come in my life
I'll just have to find them all, one by one, step by step

四根蜡烛的故事

2012-01-04T13:11:00.000+08:00

当人类被诞生于大地之时，上天同时恩赐了四根蜡烛，好让这些蜡烛能够在黑暗中给人们指引方向。经过岁月的洗礼，世界…来到了某个平安夜的晚上。

这个晚上，第一根蜡烛说话了。

我的名字叫和平。

我已经被人们给遗忘了。现在这世界上充斥着纷争，憎恨，仇怨，人们可以简单的为了一饱私欲而发动战争，为了金钱而做出不法勾当，伤害着身边的人，伤害着自己。看来，我已经不再被需要了，我的亮光，已经再也无法照亮人们的心房了。

说完，第一根蜡烛熄灭了。

然后，第二根蜡烛也说话了。

我的名字叫信仰。

我已经被人们给遗忘了。现在这世界上已经不再有人抱有任何信仰了。宗教上的信仰也好，人与人之间的信仰也好。人们都只会忙着工作赚钱而忽略了自己内心的声音，人们愿意为了所谓的生活而苟且残存，抛弃自己，抛弃信仰而活下去。看来，我已经不再被需要了，我的亮光，已经再也无法照亮人们的心房了。

说完，第二根蜡烛熄灭了。

接着，第三根蜡烛也说话了。

我的名字叫爱情。

我已经被人们给遗忘了。现在这世界上已经不再有相信爱情的人存在了。人们现在只是懂得爱自己而不懂的去爱别人。人们为了爱自己而不惜去伤害身边的每一个人。看来，我已经不再被需要了，我的亮光，已经再也无法照亮人们的心房了。

说完，第三根蜡烛也熄灭了。

这时候，最后一根蜡烛说话了。

和平，信仰，爱情，你们可不能熄灭啊。如果我们都消失了，那么人们就真的完全失去了一切了。来，让我把我的烛火借给你们，好让你们重新点亮吧。

说着，第四根蜡烛用自己那微弱的烛火，把和平，信仰和爱情的蜡烛给点上了。

这时候，三根蜡烛不约而同的说道：为什么？为什么你要把我们重新点燃？人们已经变得多么丑陋，多么腐败，你也是亲眼看见的啊…但是为什么你还要相信这他们呢？

听着，第四根蜡烛微笑着回答道：因为我的名字叫做希望。就算人们已经变得丑陋，腐败，但是，我仍然坚信着总有一天他们会回来寻找我们的亮光。如果我们自己先放弃了人类，那着世界就不再有任何希望了，人们也将不再会有未来了。寻找着我们的亮光的人，不是还有吗？虽然人数可能很少，但是我希望有朝一日，那些少许的亮光，能够好像我一样，把身边的人都点亮，那世界不就会变得美好了吗？

听完，三根蜡烛也微笑了。

直到今天，这四根蜡烛依然立于这世界上，散发着自己的亮光，照耀着人们，温暖着寻找它们的人。

2011 ---> 2012

2011-12-29T12:14:00.002+08:00

回首2011年，看着自己设下的目标，到底有多少个达成了，有多少个放弃了，有多少个在进行中，有多少个失败了…

然后再回首2011年里自己做了什么，经历了什么，学到了什么，看到了什么…

工作上，上半年可以说是遇到了一些瓶颈，然后接受了前往迪拜工作半年的合约，希望来到这里可以转换心情，然后突破自己面对的那瓶颈，但是，最后好像还是卡着没法突破。再多给自己一些时间吧，希望明年能够找到自己想做的，要做的，然后有一番作为…

家庭上，没什么改变。僵持的关系依然僵持，好的关系依然完好…今年的自己也许逃避了许许多多的问题，也许真的是时候要好好正视了？

2011年，发现自己最常问的问题是“我到底在做什么？这是我要的生活吗？”

今晚开始就没能上网了，也许要等到1月1号或2号才能够上网吧。也许这是一件好事，让自己可以静下心来，好好的窥看自己到底想要什么。

2012年的展望？详细的就不多说了，总而言之，我希望2012年会是我开始正视自己，追求梦想的一年。真的不想为了赚钱，每天过着机器人般的生活。我要活出自己的人生，自己的未来。

祝愿大家新年快乐。

圣诞夜

2011-12-27T01:10:00.005+08:00

今年的圣诞有一点不一样

因为在一个没有飘雪的冬天里度过

因为在一段疲累中度过

因为在一段旅行中度过

因为只身在国外度过

因为不是一个人默默的度过...

明年的圣诞节...期待中。

平安夜

2011-12-24T02:12:00.001+08:00

结束了一段摄影风潮
打算这几天好好的整理一下自己的写作
然后是时候开始放多一些心思在吉他上
总觉得有些忽略了他
是时候开始挑战自己的音乐造化了
平安夜？
没什么，只是另一个独自度过的夜晚
仅此而已。

Recently

2011-12-21T02:20:00.001+08:00

Things that I want to do...
Things that I need to do...
Things that I wish to do...
Things just getting pile up like a mountain

Recently, feeling myself rather "messy"
Everything seems to be out of control
Everything seems to be so un-organised
Nothing seems to be right

Well, have to keep my feet on the ground anyway
Try to get things done slowly
One by one, step by step
And hope everything will turn out fine soon

我。时区的过客

2011-12-14T00:28:00.001+08:00

穿梭在一个又一个不同的时区

时差不断变更，季节不断变换

唯一没有改变的…是背井离乡的这一事实

也许…自己已经默默的恋上了这种生活也说不定

自由自在，独来独往，毫无顾虑，不是很好吗？

虽然说已经习惯了这种飘荡的生活

但是，人…还是会有渴望着回家的时候

心…还是会渴望着停泊在一个避风港

一想到这里，心…就开始慌，开始乱了

也许常年在外的奔波，身心都开始觉得疲惫了吧

也许离乡背井那么多年，是时候倦鸟归巢了吧

在自己的家，在自己选择的避风港，在与大家相同的时区里…

我…就能够得到幸福吗？

我…就能够活得更好吗？

想到这里，人…又开始却步了

总觉得进退两难似的

最后的最后，人…还是那么的无助…

独自畏缩在自己的时间与空间里

一个人…苟且偷生…苟且残存下去…

原来，我只是另一个时区的过客

仅此而已...

Children Who Chase Lost Voices from Deep Below 星を追う子ども

2011-12-10T01:17:00.001+08:00

Well, even though the story titled as "Children who chase the star", but the whole story isn't really related to star at all. Anyway, this is the latest master piece by Makoto Shinkai, the director of "Byousoku 5cm", my all time favorite animation movie.

It is obvious that this time around he is using a different approach to tell his story. The story doesn't make me crying like "Byousoku 5cm", but this doesn't mean that the story is not touching. The graphic is still very nice, and so does the message Makoto Shinkai wants to deliver to everyone.

The meaning of life... the meaning of living... the meaning of death...

The story is started rather rapidly, pouring a lot of information for you to digest about the world and timeline of it... but soon it slows down to explain each and every of them, one by one. Everything is clearly told, the story, the character, the message... everything unfold slowly and gently. Although one may argue the storyline is a little "predictable", but the difference will be the how the whole message is being convey to the audience.

For those who have lost their love one... for those who are afraid of losing your love one... for those who are a little misserable about your life now... take a look into this movie and hopefully you will find that little special meaning inside like I did...

Here's the movie theme song and lyrics in chinese... hope you like it as well.

Hello, Goodby and Hello
熊木杏里

Hello Goodbye and Hello 與你相逢現在與你離別
Hello Goodbye and Hello 然後向沒有你的這個世界 Hello
那個時候還不知道真正的離別
漸漸破壞的心一直在尋找著你
如果你能聽見有很多的話想告訴你
全心全意永遠讓你充滿笑容許下誓言想留在你身邊

Hello Goodbye and Hello 與你相逢現在與你離別
Hello Goodbye and Hello 然後向沒有你的這個世界 Hello
在喜歡上你的時候已經踏上了旅程
Hello Goodbye and Hello 永遠把你記住在心裡
Hello Goodbye and Hello 然後沿著這條路繼續前進
不想失去願望是最遠的那一顆星天空遼闊就如明天
雖然漫無邊際但我想伸出雙手
“Hello Goodbye and Hello 與你相逢現在與你離別
Hello Goodbye and Hello 然後向沒有你的這個世界 Hello”

私の物語 Ver. 5.5

2011-12-06T00:37:00.001+08:00

As year end approach... many things starting to run in my mind
Many things need to think about and consider about...
As when new year comes, I need to start and make things right
So no matter it is life, work, relations or anything else...
I think a lot recently... and I haven't really find the way out yet
Hopefully everything will sort out soon... step by step

For those who realized, I have changed the "Labels" of all my post
Now only left 6 major labels for all my posts
And the Navigation Tab has been changed as well
No more "My Stories", "My Gunpla" and "My Photography" page there
Well, it's not that I abandoned those pages... well, you'll see
Anyway, my personal background page is still available there
Some renovation and revamp of all my stuff on the internet has been done
Phase 1 and 2 has already completed... now need to get phase 3 kick start
Hopefully by end of this week everything can settle down a little
Have been feeling tired recently, not sure why... hope won't fall sick

就这样...十二月来临了

2011-12-02T02:57:00.001+08:00

十二月...说时迟，那时快
就这样，一年又过去了
好像什么都没做到就过去了
时间，岁月...真的很无情啊
回顾自己在今年给自己设下的目标与计划
到底有多少个目标已经达成了呢？
到底有多少个计划已经实行了呢？
虽然达成的目标并不多
但是决定实行的计划基本都在进行中
那么，接下来就是要和自己进行一段最真实的谈话
剖析这一年来的自己...
然后，希望能够有个更好的计划和目标
好让自己在2012年里...能够继续昂首前进

One Day

2011-11-24T01:36:00.001+08:00

Today, in the year of 2011… what have you done?

Today, in the year of 2010… what have you done?

Today, in the year of 2009…

Today, in the year of 2008…

2007…

2006…

…

It makes you wonder awhile, doesn’t it?

“One Day” is a movie of love story, a story between a guyand a girl, and what had happened between them on 15 of July, starting from1988 until 2011. Every year, their life changes, and so does their relationshipas well. From good friends to ordinary friends… from loving to hating eachother… from regretting to finally getting together… the things that arechanging were not just their relations, also their life, their view, theirmindset and their relations with others…

After watching the movie, it really makes me thinkawhile… what am I doing last year on today? And what was it for the previousyears? I can’t really recall, but I do think that when that comes together, Iwill be able to see the changes of me as well, year after year.

I wonder… in years to come… today…

What will I be doing? Where will I be living? Will I evenlike my life? And how far will I go…

Non-work related target in Dubai

2011-11-23T14:00:00.001+08:00

Produce a book of myself... DONE
Produce a time-lapse video... DONE
Produce some nice picture in Dubai... DONE
Produce a new story... IN PROGRESS
Improve my guitar skills... NOT MUCH PROGRESS
Improve my photography skills... SLOWLY IN PROGRESS
Work out more and stay healthy... DIDN'T REALLY WORK OUT A LOT
"Dream chasing" trip... PLANNING IN PROGRESS

冠军

2011-11-19T01:59:00.001+08:00

《冠军》...可以说是韩国电影久违的一套佳作。
故事讲述的，是人与人之间的爱，亲人之间的爱，人与动物之间的爱
一个失去视力的骑士和一个跛了脚的赛马
它成为了他的眼睛，他成为了它的动力
他和它因为一场意外而相遇，因为一场意外而心连心
他失去了他心爱的妻子，而它失去了它心爱的儿子
这对不可能的组合，造就了不可能的传奇，完成了不可能的任务
改编至真实故事...这，绝对是值得一看，赚人热泪的感动之作。

星空

2011-11-12T01:12:00.001+08:00

最近看了这部电影...《星空》。
原来是几米绘本改编的故事。这是一部值得一看的电影，从拍摄手法，到故事铺排都做得很不错。虽然故事是一贯的青春爱情剧，但是还是隐约的被这部影片给吸引着。

也许是因为自己曾经也写过几篇关于星空的文章吧...但是绝对无法和五月天的“星空”比拟的，他们写的词实在是太棒了。
也许是因为自己对故事里头的情节深感同受吧...

身边有再多的人，但是却没有一个可以交心的对象。
身边有再多的幸福，却还是会忍不住抬头望着寂寞的星空。

在人生这一幅拼图里，我...始终在寻找着缺掉的，遗失的那一块...好让我能够把这幅拼图...变得完整。

虽然不是什么催泪作品，但是还是能够引人深思，同时也许会唤醒你内心深处某段埋藏的回忆吧。希望大家也会喜欢这部电影，同时好好品尝这首主题曲吧...

星空
五月天

摸不到的颜色是否叫彩虹
看不到的拥抱是否叫做微风
一个人想着一个人
是否就叫寂寞

命运偷走如果只留下结果
时间偷走初衷只留下了苦衷
你来过然后你走后
只留下星空

那一年我们望着星空
有那么多的灿烂的梦
以为快乐会永久
像不变星空陪着我

猎户天狼织女光年外沉默
回忆青春梦想何时偷偷陨落
我爱过然后我沉默
人海里漂流

那一年我们望着星空
未来的未来从没想过
当故事失去美梦美梦失去线索
而我们失去联络
这一片无言无语星空
为什么静静看我泪流
如果你在的时候
会不会伸手拥抱我

细数繁星闪烁细数此生奔波
原来所有所得所获不如一夜的星空
空气中的温柔回忆你的笑容
彷佛只要伸手就能触摸

摸不到的颜色是否叫彩虹
看不到的拥抱是否叫做微风
一个人习惯一个人
这一刻独自望着星空
从前的从前从没变过
寂寞可以是忍受也可以是享受
享受仅有的拥有
那一年我们望着星空
有那么多的灿烂的梦
至少回忆会永久
像不变星空陪着我
最后只剩下星空
像不变回忆陪着我

我的书，我的故事 ~ 私の物語

2011-11-09T02:23:00.000+08:00

也许对许多人来说，这...是很无聊的事吧
一个得空没事做的人才会去做的事情
无论如何
我，制作了一本书
一本完全属于我自己的书
里面摘录了一些我曾在这部落格里发布的文章
当中也加插了一些新的文章和图片
嘛...总而言之，这算是人生的一个里程碑的标志吧
有兴趣的人，不妨下载来看看吧

在这里，必须谢谢身边的每一个人
没有你们，就没有今天的我
没有你们，也许我也走不到这么遥远
我还得对身边的每一个人说声对不起
请原谅我的任性，请宽恕我的过错

希望我们能在某个时间与空间交错的未来
相遇，相拥，相见，甚至相爱吧...

点击阅读 - 私の物語
P/S: 仅供阅读，请勿滥用或更改本书内容。谢谢。

Colorful

2011-11-06T01:38:00.001+08:00

Just watched this movie titled "Colorful"...
A story about a boy who committed suicide, and was given a second chance to live his life again in order to make things right...
Throughout the story, the boy has learn the meaning of friendship, family, love and most importantly, the meaning of living...
A slow pace story, but indeed it is nicely done...
To watch this movie this time around really brings some great meaning to me...
A very touching story about life...
It makes you think again the life you are having now...
And how you should continue for the rest of the journey...
I think is time for me to sit down and think about the life that I want to live...
Hopefully... it will be "colorful"...

张信哲 - 花季未了

2011-10-29T02:19:00.000+08:00

最近心情都在低谷徘徊

为什么？很多原因吧...

那天，在电视机里偶然看见了这MV...

情歌王子的歌声又再一次的触动了我的心灵

这首歌的歌词，完全描绘了我现在的心情...

看来，这几天的我会反复的听着这首歌曲吧...

希望...能够在这深渊里...得到一点点的安慰与温暖...

张信哲 - 花季未了
填词:许常德作曲:郭蘅祈

我想要的你却给不了
爱情至今只剩下拥抱
我感觉你想逃我却放不掉
麻烦你来陪我苦恼

我想爱的我拥有不了
缘份强求谁都受不了
昨天开的花朵今天却谢了
伤心一朵幸福一朵知多少

花季未了你却走了泪在掉
剩下的绽放回忆里烧
花季未了余情未了直到天老
也许遗憾才让人生美好

我想忘的早就该忘掉
誓言在昨天已落幕了
有些戏太冗长难懂难了
不如简单精彩就好

花季未了你却走了泪在掉
剩下的绽放回忆里烧
花季未了余情未了直到天老
也许遗憾才让人生美好

花季未了人却散了风在飘
何时再重逢谁又知道
花季未了天夜黑了分分秒秒
相见离别都仍觉得你最好

花季未了余情未了直到天老
也许遗憾才让人生美好

我…要快乐

2011-10-26T20:48:00.003+08:00

戴上耳机，与世隔绝

躺在床上的我，听着歌，思绪放空

心，突然一阵刺痛

耳朵里传来的那句歌词，多么的讽刺

我并不是天生爱寂寞，却比任何人都多

就算把世界给我，我还是一无所有

张惠妹的《我要快乐》

短短两句，却唱到了我的心里

双手情不自禁的紧握

泪水…渐渐的从眼角溢了出来

被单上被浸湿的痕迹，久久都未能干去

只有眼泪是真的…歌词是这样的唱着

泪水总是伴随着孤单

其实乐观的想，孤单不是还有泪水做伴吗？

偶尔还会有寂寞和孤独来做客

一切…并没有想像般的差吧？

把从前想了一遍，谢谢了…伤我的人

谢谢你们让我学会了孤单，认识了孤独，熟悉了寂寞。因为…

懂得孤单的人，才会更懂得珍惜身边那让自己不再孤单的人

懂得寂寞的人，才会更懂得珍惜身边那让自己不再寂寞的人

懂得孤独的人，才会更懂得珍惜身边那让自己不再孤独的人

懂得哭泣的人，才会更懂得珍惜身边那让自己展颜欢笑的人

就算最后有人陪伴在身边也好，独自一人也好…

我…要快乐

3rd week in Dubai...

2011-10-22T02:47:00.000+08:00

3 weeks for now…

For life… everything has been settling down so far…

As what I usually said: I’m easily adapting to theenvironment

Work wise… still need to do some catch up

Need to get some of the things confirm as soon aspossible in order to carry out my project

If not, my time will be wasted for doing nothing at all

Do I miss friends? Do I miss this? And do I miss that?

Honestly, I don’t know… I never really think about it

Maybe this is the better way for me not to stuck myselfinto home sick?

Anyway, live goes on…

Just hope that I can get something here…

And hope that I will get a clearer direction on what todo in my future…

Getting closer to my L'20 dream...

2011-10-20T00:55:00.001+08:00

Remember I talk about a dream which I'm about to achieve next year?
I mentioned about it before this in the old post...
Anyway, it's getting clearer...
And when things started to unfold, the dream seems to be getting closer...
And it seems to be within my reach now...
But at the same time... I'm starting to feel a little scare and worry...
What if I failed to catch this dream... even if it is so close to be grabbed...
I bet it will be a very great disappointment...
Just hope and pray that I really can achieve it next year...
Will try my best... and will give whatever it takes...
Well, in the end people might think that what I'm trying to achieve is stupid...
But... that's one of my dream...
And I have worked myself to achieve it... that's all matters...
Wish me luck...

私の物語 Ver. 5.0

2011-10-13T02:55:00.001+08:00

Yes, since the day I start blogging here in blogger, this is the 5th overhaul on the blog... I think I will settle down with this layout for some times before switching again. It has been a habit of mine to make some changes when there's changes in my life... either changing the profile picture or changing the blog template and layout & etc. This time around is still the same.

It has been 2 weeks staying in Dubai for work transition... still in the mist of getting the project proposal ready for my boss's approval. Life here has so far been positive. Well, I'm just the kind of people who can adapt easily to change in environment, so it wouldn't be an issue for me whether to work in Malaysia or oversea.

And I'm just the kind of person that will not stop my brain from thinking... yes, there are some free time here since I'm not that "Active" in outdoor activity compared to back in Malaysia. So those free time has been spent to do a little bit of thinking. Thoughts that are mainly surrounding my jobs and life... I guess I will have to make some decisions in near future, and I'm still thinking on them...

Well, it's good to do some thinking sometimes, but it does make me feel dull, down and frustrated if over doing it. So I decided to grab myself a guitar by the end of this week and start picking up my guitar skills... and at the same time, diverting my mind from thinking too much on other things. Just hope that I can get a balance point between life, work, future and satisfaction even though I'm so far away from my friends and family.

A whole new profile picture

A whole new blog template

A whole new mindset

A whole new energy pumping in

And a whole new me to face all the up coming challenges...

R.I.P. - Steve Jobs

2011-10-08T14:20:00.002+08:00

Honestly, I must admit he changed the electronic world so much.

Honestly, I must admit that all the inventions from Apple are so tempting.

Honestly, I must admit I owned nothing branded under Apple before.

A man has departed to heaven, and what's left over is just memory.

I once read a story about this man from newspaper

A story about three stories he shared during a graduation ceremony

I found these stories are somehow inspiring

It makes you think twice... and think deep

And now, he has changed not just the world of electronics, but also our world of thinking as well...

I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the finest universities in the world. I never graduated from college. Truth be told, this is the closest I’ve ever gotten to a college graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That’s it. No big deal. Just three stories.

The first story is about connecting the dots.

I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why did I drop out?

It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: “We have an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?” They said: “Of course.” My biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would someday go to college.

And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class parents’ savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six months, I couldn’t see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn’t interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.

It wasn’t all romantic. I didn’t have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends’ rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on. Let me give you one example:

Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I had dropped out and didn’t have to take the normal classes, I decided to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space between different letter combinations, about what makes great typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way that science can’t capture, and I found it fascinating.

None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And since Windows just copied the Mac, it’s likely that no personal computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.

Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

My second story is about love and loss.

I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.

I really didn’t know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down – that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.

I didn’t see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.

During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple’s current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.

I’m pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn’t been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith. I’m convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You’ve got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don’t settle.

My third story is about death.

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn’t even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor’s code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you’d have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.

I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I’m fine now.

This was the closest I’ve been to facing death, and I hope it’s the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960′s, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.

Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words: “Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.” It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.

a Week in Dubai

2011-10-07T01:03:00.002+08:00

Nothing much happened so far...
Safely reached... everything seems organized here...
First impression on this place is: Skyscrapers and dust...
You will find these 2 elements covering 99% of Dubai...
Food is slightly more expensive than Malaysia...
Restaurant price tag are crazy here...
Other than that... nothing much really
Just working and earn a living...
It will be the same no matter where I am...

一段旅途的结束，另一段旅程的开始

2011-09-27T21:24:00.005+08:00

终于，上了最后一堂吉他课

不知道还要多久，我才能够在一次向他学习吉他

但是，这短暂的相遇，却真的是让我获益不浅

学习吉他的日子，就这样过了九个月

也就这样迎来了终结

这...或许只是意味着自习吉他的阶段的开始

若有机会，还真是希望再一次向蔡老师学习吉他

在倒数的日子里，还是如往常般...

劳累，精疲力尽

工作依然繁忙，还要忙着准备行李

也许这才是最好的吧...

因为这样就能分散我的精力，不会把它花在胡思乱想上

好的事情，最后终要结束

希望迎接我的未来...

会是另一个...好的事情...

伍佰 - 泪桥

2011-09-24T15:54:00.001+08:00

最近突然常听到这首歌...
算是伍佰大哥难得的慢歌...很有味道和感觉的一首歌。

无心过问你的心里我的吻
厌倦我的亏欠
代替你所爱的人
这个时候
我心落花一样飘落下来
顿时　我的视线
失去了色彩
知道你也一样不善于表白
想想你的相爱编织的谎言懈怠
甜美镜头
竟也落花一样飘落下来
从此　我的生命
变成了尘埃
寂寞的人
总是习惯寂寞的安稳
至少　我们直线　曾经交叉过
就像站在烈日骄阳大桥上
眼泪狂奔滴落在我的脸庞
啦~~~~~~~~~

Home Alone

2011-09-17T00:30:00.001+08:00

Home alone again...
It seems like I'm always home alone recently...
Maybe this is the chance God gave to me to get used to being all by myself
Anyway, don't worry about me, I'm alright even if I'm all alone...
Although it is unavoidable for me to become a little emo when I'm all by myself
But everything will be alright, yup... Things will get better, slowly
Running out of time... just hope everything will turn right as life goes on...
It's not that bad being all alone after all... since I'm too used to it
So... let's see what will happen in the future...

给蔡老师的信

2011-09-14T21:43:00.000+08:00

昨天晚上，上了倒数第三堂的吉他课

因为老师教的一首歌弹了两个星期都还没练好

所以一进去就先向老师自首：“没什么进展呢，不要期望太高”

他只是笑笑，叫我快点弹

一切就像往常一样...他不断地纠正我弹错的地方...

“手要软一点...姿势不对...换弦快点...跟好拍子...”

弹着，他把一片guitar pick拿出来，示范弹了给我看

“学下用这个弹...这样捉住...弹轻一点...要快...”

一瞬间，感觉上好像许多的东西被灌输到脑海里

半个小时很快就过去了

临走之前，老师把我叫住了

“我在书店里看到一本书，四十多块，从浅到深的教你弹吉他，可以去看看...”

应了老师一声，我到书店里转了一下...

内心，切实的感受到了一股温暖

老师他看来似乎比我还要紧张...

也许想尽可能的在我离开前教我更多的东西，好让我未来慢慢自修

感动，非常的谢谢他的这份心意

这将会是我未来继续自修的最大动力来源

还记得第一次上他的课时，总觉得他很严肃，没什么谈话

但是渐渐的，一切都改变了

也许他和我一样，都不习惯和陌生人说话吧

刚开始的那份距离感...如今已经烟消云散

对不起，因为我是一个那么没天赋的学生

谢谢你，因为一直努力教导我和没放弃过我这样的一个学生

希望将来还有机会再向这位恩师多多学习...

九月

2011-09-08T21:02:00.000+08:00

现在看到的，九月就只有一个“忙”字

做不完的工作，解决不完的问题

平服不了的情绪，预见不了的未来

真的让我有点喘不过气来

护照到期了必须更新

手头上有大大小小的工作必须在这个月里完成

还有不少的东西要交代清楚

周末看来也会忙着工作吧...

也没什么关系吧...就那么一个人

平时也是呆在家而已

看到报纸刊着张信哲的演唱会广告

自己只能低头叹气...这次去不成了，下次吧！

家里也有许多必须解决与交代的事物

虽然到现在还不知道十月会变得怎样

但是还是事先安排一下吧

到时候就不必慌乱了

无法控制的事情...无法克制自己一而再的去想它

算了吧，想想就好了，反正什么也做不到

让自己的心绪跌入谷底也不是什么好玩的事

但是这九月的我...应该会过得很阴沉吧...

那天跟吉他老师说将会暂停三个月左右

惊讶的是，他的表情并不是我想象中的平淡

可以感觉到有一丝的失望...

希望我能够把这份感觉化为我前进的力量吧

经过了风风雨雨，来到了九月

除了累，其实已没有什么其他的感觉了

希望自己行尸走肉的日子可以快些过去

我并不想在这样过完我的下半辈子...

九月雨

2011-09-01T23:01:00.001+08:00

趁着难得的假期

难得的只有我一个人呆在家里

翻开了自己收藏的影片

看着一部又一部感人的电影

放纵着自己让眼泪直流

让自己的情绪难得的失控一下

好久没有这样坦然地面对自己了

现实的生活往往造就了我把任何事情都往心里掩埋

是时候让他们倾泻了吧？

想起了曾经，想起了过去

有甜美的回忆，有苦涩的往事

现在的我，有怎样呢？

当未来的我回想起现在的我时...会联想到什么呢？

就这样在过去，现在和未来之间周旋，徘徊

眼泪，湿了又干，干了又湿

希望自己难得的被洗涤干净

然后更有勇气，更加坚强的把路走下去...

岁月轻狂 - 李治廷

2011-08-31T11:38:00.002+08:00

岁月神偷电影主题曲

水一般的少年
风一般的歌
梦一般的遐想
从前的你和我

手一挥就再见
嘴一翘就笑
脚一动就踏前
从前的少年

啊~ 漫天的回响
放眼看岁月轻狂
啊~ 岁月轻狂

起风的日子流洒奔放
细雨飘飘心晴朗
云上去云上看
云上走一趟
青春的黑夜挑灯流浪
青春的爱情不回望
不回想不回答
不回忆不回眸
反正也不回头

啊~ 漫天的回响
放眼看岁月轻狂
啊~ 岁月轻狂

起风的日子流洒奔放
细雨飘飘心晴朗
云上去云上看
云上走一趟
青春的黑夜挑灯流浪
青春的爱情不回望
不回想不回答
不回忆不回眸
回不了头

The Young Age | Musicians Available

August End

2011-08-26T22:06:00.000+08:00

Wonder why... my blog post is getting lesser and lesser...
Maybe I'm too lazy to blog? Maybe I'm too busy to blog?
I wonder...
Anyway, 8 months passed by... and all that is accumulated in me are frustrations... and more frustrations...
Well, there are many "contributors" that contribute towards these frustrations...

Work will be the main contributor...
Feeling a little lost again... can see the direction... can't feel the future clearly...
Maybe is time to move on and go for a new challenge?

My physical ability is another contributor...
What I want to put out is I'm losing energy... maybe is just a sign of aging?
But I found myself harder to coupe for sports activity more and more, day after day...
Oh boy, am I sick or this is just normal? Pain and ache everywhere... my body just doesn't seems alright...

Life... contributing frustration as well...
Relation issues are yet to be solve... not love issue here... just some family problem
And all I did all this while is just ignoring it and running myself away...
Sigh... what a mess

It's been more than a year since I'm back home
It's been more than a year since I start working
But my life is still... seems to be unable to settle down...
Ended up with more and more frustration accumulating
Wonder when will it blows up?

A week of hard earned and long waited holiday is ahead of me
Hope I can press on the "reset" button and re-order my life
I don't want my life to go on like this
I need a way out... and I'm eagerly searching for it...

杨宗纬 - 那个男人

2011-08-15T08:33:00.001+08:00

现不谈论这首歌是否好听，我只是想说...我很喜欢这歌词。很有感觉，唱着我的心声，触动我的心灵。希望你们也会喜欢。

那個男人

有個男人愛著你用心愛著你
那個男人愛著你徹底愛著你
他情願變成影子守候著你跟隨著你
那個男人愛著你心卻在哭泣

還需要多久多長多傷
你才會聽見他沒說的話
堅強像謊言一樣不過是一種偽裝
他只希望有個機會能被你愛上

還需要多久多長多渴望
你才會走向他貼在他的身旁
微笑像謊言一樣是最起碼的假裝
眼淚只能躲藏

那個男人愛著你忘記了自己
從此他小心翼翼靜靜等待愛情
他情願選擇相信為了你不言不語
那個男人愛著你傷埋在回憶

不論要多久多長多傷
他還是愛著你一如往常
就好像一個傻瓜對著那空氣說話
他會不會有個機會能被你愛上

還需要多久多長多渴望
你才會走向他貼在他的身旁
微笑像謊言一樣是最起碼的假裝
眼淚只能躲藏

那個男人就是我你知道嗎
還是知道卻假裝不知道嗎
問到沙啞
你也不會
回答

還需要多久多長多傷
你才會聽見我沒說的話
堅強像謊言一樣不過是一種偽裝
我只希望有個機會能被你愛上

不論要多久多長多受傷
我還是愛著你每分每秒一樣
就好像一個傻瓜對著那空氣說話
等著被你愛上

Venture to the unknown...

2011-08-05T23:11:00.000+08:00

Wondering what I'm wondering...
Been thinking a bit lately... well, maybe a lot...

After half year learning guitar, I'm beginning to get a hold on it...
And there comes the "disasters"... job transition to other country...
Feel a little "sad" about it (maybe my guitar teacher will be happy about it? haha...)
I will try to continue on self learning... I don't want to end up half way...
I really want to make this stick... and I will try my best...

Same goes to photography... well, this is not that big issue...
I can still bring all my gears over and continue shooting...
Really got to sharpen my skills further...
And of course, my target for getting myself a DSLR next year is still on...
This is what I want... so I will try to make it a dream come true as well...

For my Gundam modelling hobby... I will still continue on whenever I can...
I like to use my hand to craft out things...
I enjoy the process, and the moment of the finishing touch...
Although it may not be the major hobby for me for next year...
But I will still continue on when it is within my reach...

Up to now, I'm still searching for what I really want for work...
Maybe this is a good chance for me to explore and decide what I really want...
In fact, I'm still searching for what I really want for life...
Need some time to think and decide... on my needs, my dream, my goal
Is time to plan nicely and get all the puzzle pieces together...

Talk about dream... I really hope to attend the L'20 World Tour which is next year...
Place is not confirmed yet, maybe Hong Kong, Bangkok, Taipei or Shang Hai...
I really hope that I can get myself a ticket and attend the "once in a life time" event...
This will definitely be the best "star chasing" experience...
Will try to make it happen so that there will be no regret in future...

For my family... there's nothing much but "sorry"...
All this while I have not been a good child in the family...
I just don't know why... but I don't know what to say when the time comes...
I don't know how to be a good child in the family...
Sorry for always being the black sheep among the white...

And for the someone I adore...
I don't know how far we can go... and whether you are willing to do so...
But still, I'll pray for your happiness...
It may not be both of us, but still you will live your life a great one...
Crossing my fingers and blessing you with all my wishes...

I can't foresee the future...
But I can anticipate and plan for what might be coming...
Really hope that I'll not disappoint anyone...
I'll do my best, as what I always do...
And we'll see what will be the return...

Better stop wondering what I'm wondering...
And start getting my ass move and get the job done...

Wu Xia (武侠)

2011-07-24T15:42:00.000+08:00

Went to watch this movie... well, how can I miss the movie of Takeshi Kaneshiro... haha... anyway, let's talk about what I feel about this movie here.

The story begins with an incident happened in a small village, where 2 wanted criminals attempt to rob a shop. And Donnie Yen saved the shop owner and "accidentally" killed the 2 criminals. And here comes Takeshi Kaneshiro... investigating the truth behind this incident. The way the story unfold is very interesting and tempting. The more he investigate, the more truth has been unveiled. He found out that Donnie Yen didn't killed the 2 criminals by accident. In fact, he is a great kung fu master, and he killed them both by his intention.

This is where the turning point of the story begins. Donnie Yen admitted he was a murderer before this, and now he want to have a new life again being an ordinary people, a good guy. But Takeshi Kaneshiro didn't think so. He believes that there are no "good guy" or "bad guy" in this world. We decide to be good or bad by our intention and things will change at any time and any moment. He wanted to arrest Donnie Yen. However, Donnie Yen's father (who had trained him to become a murderer and kung fu master) has managed to found him and want him back to his side to help him. Donnie Yen refuse, and then the conflict between them begins.

Well, up until this point the story is still very interesting. But things turn out to be rather disappointing towards the end. At the very beginning, the story is emphasizing everyone has a good and bad personality inside, and this can be shown clearly from Takeshi Kaneshiro's act and also Donnie Yen's act. However, towards the end, this point is no longer being the center of the story line. In the end, Donnie Yen lose his left arms, Takeshi Kaneshiro died protecting Donnie Yen, and his father died "accidentally". And Donnie Yen live on happily ever after in the small village with his wife...

So, first I don't know why the director has lose his focus on the main theme towards the end... secondly, I got no idea why this movie have this title. It is not about action or kung fu... rather there are only some fighting action towards the end of the movie... which is only a small portion of it. The story is talking about something deeper within everyone. Third, the ending is rather lame... if the main theme of this story is able to carry on until the end, this would have been a great movie. They should ditch those fighting scene and work more on the emotional side. Like in the end, when Takeshi Kaneshiro died, the "bad guy" inside him is standing in front of him and crying... crying for the sacrifice of the "good guy" in him... this is a rather good interpretation which brings out the whole concept of the story.

Well, all in all, the movie did make me think about some of the things like what I have mentioned above... some are quite true... and leaves me ponder for awhile. Worth to watch in cinema? Hmm... I don't think many will like this movie. I like the concept, like the beginning... but dislike the ending. A good story, but poorly told. That is how I can conclude this movie.

突然好想你

2011-07-17T18:49:00.000+08:00

到底是何时开始...喜欢上了这一首歌？

已经不记得了...但是，没关系。

除了歌曲好听，当然最重要的还是因为他的歌词

说真的，句句都写到我心底去了

这难得的共鸣，让我沉醉在这首歌曲里...无法自拔

如果我能够有这样的才华，把我内心的想法，感触与情怀都写下来...

那...会有多好啊...

无论如何，这首歌已成为了我的K歌，我的“饮歌”...

也许唱得不好，没关系

只要让自己沉溺在这段情感，这段旋律里...

那...就足够了...

突然好想你
五月天

最怕空气突然安静
最怕朋友突然的关心
最怕回忆突然翻滚绞痛着不平息
最怕突然听到你的消息

想念如果会有声音
不愿那是悲伤的哭泣
事到如今终於让自已属於我自已
只剩眼泪还骗不过自己

突然好想你，你会在哪里
过的快乐或委屈
突然好想你，突然锋利的回忆
突然模糊的眼睛

我们像一首最美丽的歌曲
变成两部悲伤的电影
为什麽你带我走过最难忘的旅行
然後留下最痛的纪念品

我们那麽甜那麽美那麽相信
那麽疯那麽热烈的曾经
为何我们，还是要奔向各自的幸福和遗憾中老去

突然好想你，你会在哪里
过的快乐或委屈
突然好想你，突然锋利的回忆
突然模糊的眼睛

最怕空气突然安静
最怕朋友突然的关心
最怕回忆突然翻滚绞痛着不平息
最怕突然听到你的消息
最怕此生已经决定自己过，没有你却又突然
听到你的消息

July... nothing special

2011-07-13T18:59:00.000+08:00

Yup... nothing special this month except quarrel with a Manager which is not my Manager also...
Anyway, don't want to talk about those ass hole here...

July... it's already half way through... time do flies quickly...
My boss is keep on asking me on "something"... and I'm yet to give him an answer
Don't feel like saying "yes" to that "something"...
Haha... "something" is just "something"... if it really happened, only will inform.

Planned a trip to Singapore in August... will take 1 day to walk around Singapore and shooting some pictures
And will spend some time meeting my friends in Singapore...
And of course the main objective is to pay my grandma a visit...
Love you... you are the best grandma in the world...

Planning a trip in September as well (technically, I'm not the one who plan for the trip...)
Wonder it will make it or not... because if that "something" happened...
This will be my last trip this year...
Pray hard... cross fingers...

Spent some time thinking about many things recently...
First one... hobby order re-shuffle: 1. Photography 2. Guitar 3. Gundam modelling...
Next... start saving for my first DSLR... target getting one by next year...
And... some decision has been made for my life... moving to the better future!!

Lastly... so eager to make one of my dream to become a success next year...
But it is not going to be easy to plan... Really hope that I can make one of my dream come true!!
What dream is that? Secret...
Will review only if I have successfully planned it...

2011 is ending soon... yes, it will end without notice...
Let's dash for the remaining 6 months in full force!!

again...

2011-07-06T05:45:00.000+08:00

2011 first half kicks off with a shit and mess...
2011 second half kicks off with another shit and mess...
both cases are due to the same people giving me trouble...
sigh...
what to do?
just hope second half will also pass through smoothly like first half...
really no eye see...

Half done for 2011

2011-06-26T20:32:00.000+08:00

yup... June is coming to an end...
is time to sit back and recap the first half of 2011
what I have wanted to achieve...
what I have achieved...
what I have failed to do...
why I have failed to do...

In terms of work, so far everything is progressing in the right direction
besides getting daily job done, I have managed to see some of my weakness
Things that I need to improve, way of thinking and solving problem
will work for that direction in second half of the year

In terms of life... more or less still the same and nothing has been progressing well
maybe I spent too much of my focus on work?
well, not really...
maybe I'm just not capable of multi-tasking...
Anyway, will try to improve my life a little as well...

All in all, although the downs are more than the ups as usual
but yet again I had survived through another 6 months... and crossing 1 year in my job
hope I can slowly gain back my feet, my rhythm, my momentum
and make it more ups than downs for the second half of 2011...

I am Me

2011-06-14T22:41:00.000+08:00

I'm not talented in anything
Nor clever or smart

But...
I'm gifted and blessed...
With a heart full with determination
Together with hard work and the spirit of never give up
I have made some small wonders in my life

From empty, I picked up a book and learn
From nothing, I picked up the racket and play
From zero, I picked up the guitar and strum
From nowhere, I picked up the camera and start shooting
From the beginning, I picked up the pieces and mold them into models

This is how I was born into this world
And this is how I will live for the rest of my life
Without any doubts and regrets

一厘米

2011-06-11T07:36:00.002+08:00

手指间仅有一厘米的距离

心却被一世纪的沉默隔离

嘴唇间只有一厘米的缝隙

心却被一公升的泪水沉溺

虽然我们只间隔着一厘米

但是这还不是我们的爱情

就算你我的心仅差一厘米

还是无法串成你我的爱情

一千次的问候能否把你的心留住？

一千遍的呼唤能否让你感到归宿？

一千封的情书能否让感情升温几度？

一千句的爱你能否让我们靠近几步？

背对背却有一厘米的差距

肩并肩仍有一厘米的微距

一厘米用一光年的速度都不能追

只好忍痛承受这一厘米的暧昧

Back to school?

2011-06-04T13:44:00.000+08:00

Recently bought some books...
Every month when I pay Kinokuniya a visit to collect my monthly magazine, I'll end up grabbing something extra...
Got about 3 books in my hand now, 2 for photography, 1 for travel.
Gosh, I like reading...
But can hardly imagine I'll be able to read all of them
When was the last time I read a book without falling asleep...
Anyway, half done for the travel one, 10% for one of the photography book...
If only I'm so hard working when I'm in University...

Last of May

2011-05-27T20:19:00.001+08:00

Not a great way to end my month of May...

Getting rather frustrated sometimes with work...

Mainly is people around me that I deal with when I work...

Workload is still manageable, but people...

Should have expected in the very first place...

As this is the so called "culture"

But still can't stop myself for feeling disappointed

In the end, I shall continue to stick with my believe...

Do everything on your own and forget about getting help from others...

Sigh...

她和她

2011-05-17T13:40:00.000+08:00

遇见了一个长得很像她的她

虽然心里非常明白她不是她

但是还是无法克制自己的想法

无法阻止心里一涌而上的阵痛

回忆过去，我和她之间的一些过往

虽然并没有手牵手，心连心的甜蜜

但是却有过许多的欢笑与快乐

也有着一丝丝的失落与不甘心

看看现在，我和她也只是相识不久

我们之间的关系是单纯的简单而已

希望自己能够阻止自己的思绪

别再留恋这那消逝已久的过往

她不会是她的替代品

我不会让她来取代她

她，很像她

她，不是她…

a small pause in May

2011-05-16T09:25:00.000+08:00

May is ending and June is around the corner
Feel like have been a little off-the-pace in work recently
Have to catch up again and go for it

As life... continues it's miserable and emptiness
With a slight of joy for the past few days as having some great moments with colleagues at Cameron Highland
When the lights go off, curtain goes down
I'm back again sitting on the thinking chair
Thinking about past, present & future

Just hope that I'll be able to pull myself together
And take on another journey in life
To seek for what to be achieved & to fill up this empty soul of mine...

Mothers' Day

2011-05-07T18:24:00.000+08:00

Pre-celebrated last week
Just the usual shopping and dining with mom together with my sisters
Nothing special
But it used to be a special day for me, before this
I wonder what's wrong
Seems like we are not getting along as well as before...
Was it my problem? I'd changed?
I wonder...
Wonder when can this be resolve...
Just hope that things will get better in future...

Malaysia... no future...

2011-05-02T14:48:00.000+08:00

I'm born as Malaysian, I must say I really love Malaysia
There's no other country in this world which can have a blend of culture like this
Where people living together in peace
Yes, we have always live in peace regardless of the religion
The word of "racism" and all other act which breaks the relations between different races...
They are here due to politics... if there's no politics in Malaysia...
Malaysia will never face this problem...

Anyway, this is not what I want to tell this time.
Yes, I love Malaysia, but I'm now starting to hate it. Why?
Because I cannot see a future... for Malaysia, for me, or for anyone...
A little to harsh to jump into a conclusion all of a sudden?
Well, the other day, I took KTM Komuter from KL Central back to Kepong
There was this pregnant women, bringing along her daughter and took the same train as me
When the train arrive, I step back to let her enter the coach first...
But sadly, there isn't any empty space to sit...
And there's no one standing up and giving out the place for pregnant woman to sit down!

Forget about 1 Malaysia
Forget about what economy transformation
Our so-called future leader, the present and coming generation...
They don't even have the simplest moral value in them
What else can we expect for years to come?
I must say I'm totally disappointed... Malaysia is such an uncivilized country...
What the hell do I pay my tax for to build a country which only produces idiots and barbarians like this...
Hopeless, speechless... this is the result from our education system
This is our Malaysia... sigh...

祝我生日快乐

2011-04-23T02:20:00.000+08:00

上星期六，刚从深圳回到家
没呆上24小时，便在星期日出发到另一个国家
星期日，那天...是我的农历生日
就这样，我的生日都在飞机上度过了
而且还是不同的国家转机中度过
也许有人会说着很好，甚至会羡慕
但是，我更喜欢平稳踏实的度过

从新加坡飞往Brissbane，一个从没踏足的地方
然后还要转机到鸟不生蛋的Papua New Guinea...
也许许多人连听都没听过这名字吧？
疲惫与不安充斥了我的头脑
机舱内那冰冷的空气更显得凝结与沉重
但意外的是，飞机上的娱乐频道竟然放着张信哲的歌曲
于是，在这7小时的漫长路途中，我，得到了一点点的安慰与温暖

没有休息的余地
没有犯错的空间
两个星期的出差
终于圆满的结束

今天，虽然说是我的阳历生日
但是，醒来之后还是得开会
直到上飞机前都必须工作
然后，就是另一个漫长的归途...生日又是在不断的转机中度过
回到家，也许只剩下数分钟的时间吧
累垮了的我，也许...只能够轻声地说声“生日快乐”来祝贺自己
然后拖着筋疲力尽的自己，躺到床上，进入梦乡吧...

Above All

2011-04-22T10:51:00.002+08:00

Above all powers above all kings
Above all nature and all created things
Above all wisdom and all the ways of man
You were here before the world began

Above all kingdoms above all thrones
Above all wonders the world has ever known
Above all wealth and treasures of the earth
There's no way to measure what You're worth

Crucified laid behind the stone
You lived to die rejected and alone
Like a Rose trampled on the ground
You took the fall and thought of me
Above all

Above all powers above all kings
Above all nature and all created things
Above all wisdom and all the ways of man
You were here before the world began

Above all kingdoms above all thrones
Above all wonders the world has ever known
Above all wealth and treasures of the earth
There's no way to measure what You're worth

Crucified laid behind the stone
You lived to die rejected and alone
Like a Rose trampled on the ground
You took the fall and thought of me
Above all

Crucified laid behind the stone
You lived to die rejected and alone
Like a Rose trampled on the ground
You took the fall and thought of me
Above all

Like a Rose trampled on the ground
You took the fall and thought of me
Above all

half way through...

2011-04-16T21:16:00.001+08:00

1 week down... another week to go... but already exhausted...
just hope everything will be ok for the coming week of business trip...

Another new chapter

2011-04-09T07:27:00.000+08:00

Yup... tomorrow will depart to Shenzhen and start my Q2 for 2011...

Return on Saturday, but fly again the next day to Papua New Guinea.

So it's a business trip that last 2 weeks in a row...

The first time to have this, hope that it's not that tiring and I still can hang on.

And hope that I can manage to get all the issues resolved as well...

Wishing good luck to myself...

And hope that these 2 weeks of experience will be useful and fruitful to me...

私の物語 2011

2011-04-02T11:46:00.000+08:00

This is my 503rd post in this blog... when was the last time I start blogging? Searching back the history, it was January 2008, the first time I moved into blogger for hosting my own blog. Before that, I was already active with posting in Friendster (yeah, there isn't any facebook yet before that time!) It really has been some time... and time to pass by in a sprint.

Venturing into the 4th year in blogger, what else do I expect and what else do I want to achieve? Well, I will still remain as who I am, continue to post in whenever I'm available, continue to post in as a record and a prove of my living... just to share my thoughts and feelings, nothing more and nothing less.

Even though nowadays there are lesser and lesser people who dive into the stream of blogging (they mainly facebook-ing now), but still... I will continue to move on as facebook is just a platform for social network, while blogger allows me to have a different way to express myself as I want.

I will continue to update all the pages I have as well other than this blog, from time to time. Feel free to drop by whenever you like. Till then, take care and hope you have enjoyed your 1st quarter of 2011.

My Photohraphy

2011-03-29T05:57:00.000+08:00

The page is finally ready. Please feel free to browse through the page for more of my photography work.
You may access by clicking the link on the right. Thank you.

我。秒速五厘米

2011-03-27T12:03:00.002+08:00

趁着难得的空档时间，我再一次细心品尝了《秒速五厘米》的动画电影和小说。这是一部无论看了多少遍还是会被深深感动，还是会让眼泪徐徐落下的作品。经过反复的阅读小说与观看电影，慢慢的察觉到，原来我和故事中的男主角有着许多不谋而合的共同点。

贵树与明里那单纯的思念，渐渐的产生的爱慕之情，然后在彼此相信着彼此都深爱着对方的同时，却发现了彼此的未来并没有对方的存在。随着时间与距离的拉扯，彼此已经拥有了自己的生活。但是，无可否认的是，无论是今天，还是明天，还是后天，贵树依然会无可救药的喜欢着明里，虽然无论他再怎么努力拉近彼此的距离，他们的心也不会互相靠近一厘米。

澄田与贵树的感情，徘徊在爱与被爱之间。但是，贵树的温柔却无法包容澄田对他的情怀。澄田在清楚地意识到贵树那温柔的眼神里，一直张望着的只有远方的另一个身影时，她，学会了放手，因为她深深地喜欢着他。

“虽然我到现在还是很喜欢贵树，但是贵树好像并不是那样喜欢我。”

这句对白，仿佛我也曾经在那里听过…

“坂口，这是我第一次那样迅速的喜欢上一个人，也是第一次知道，原来人可以如此憎恨曾经深爱的人”

这感觉也似曾相似…

“我想，贵树一定和平时说的一样，是喜欢我的。但是我们喜欢一个人的方式，好像还是有些差距吧。这一点点的差距，却让我，觉得有点痛苦。”

这…也许就是我们分手的理由吧？

我，也拥有着一段贵树与明里般的初恋。

我，也曾拥有着一个好像澄田般的人出现在我身边。

我，也曾像澄田那样深沉喜欢着一个人。

我，也曾爱过与恨过像坂口那样的女生。

也许我需要用云朵下降的速度，秒速一厘米，来缓缓地收拾自己的回忆

也许我需要用樱花飘落的速度，秒速五厘米，来慢慢的沉淀自己的情怀

也许我需要用雨水落下的速度，秒速五米，来从新迈开自己的步伐

也许我需要用火箭升空的速度，时速五公里，来奔驰向自己向往的未来

希望在我的世界里飘落的雪花

能够有天化成春天的樱花花瓣

Interest

2011-03-12T19:13:00.001+08:00

I like to think... and I like to share what I think through my writings...
I like to build models... and I enjoy my time building my Gundam...
I like to share... and it end up I have a lot of websites sharing my interest...
I like to blog... no matter what when where how... I'll keep on blogging...
I like to sport... how I wish I can have regular sports activity...
I like to photograph... and I really do want to capture every moment that is memorable...

I like to watch movie... doesn't care what type of movie it is...

I like to listen to songs... it is the best way to move your emotion...

I like music... and I am pushing myself to move forward in my guitar lesson...
I like travel... and being able to explore places for new possibilities...
I like reading... be it books or magazines, it is the source of all my knowledge...
I like sleeping... can't have enough as work is always so tiring...
I like driving... it feels good to have the control but it sucks when traffic jam...
I like gathering... it is always so warm to have everyone gathered for reunion...

I like everything that I like... equally for each of them
And life is indeed tough because there are only 24 hours a day, 7 days a week...
With so much interest in hand... it is indeed very hard to satisfied myself...
Sigh... really hope that I can get myself to do all of them...
Perhaps time management can't help me either...
Just have to coupe with it for the meantime, and see what I can do to fulfill all my interest...

New page coming soon...

2011-02-27T01:16:00.000+08:00

Every time when I'm on leave... I'll be doing something else... I know it... even though I would like to use the time to finish up my mountains of work... but in the end... it will turn out that the mountain of work still there while other "unnecessary" things were done instead...

Anyway, been trying to put up a site for my photography... not really professional at all, but I just want to record down my progress bits by bits, and hopefully I can see myself becoming better in the future... Meanwhile there's nothing there, but I will get it done soon.

Feeling down...

2011-02-23T20:58:00.000+08:00

Already foresee such a thing
But still feels sad and down when it finally happen
What to do?
Nothing can be done other than accepting
And baring the sadness the same time
Sigh
Just hope things will turn better in future...

Busy

2011-02-20T13:22:00.000+08:00

Getting busier... mainly due to work
Well, as I'm in the age of pushing for my career... nothing to be blame on
Just hope I can get it through and get things done as I wish
And at the same time... able to enjoy my life in the remaining time
As another month passed by soon... there's no more time to be wasted
Good luck and work hard... that's the only key to be hold
I'll try my best... and hope I can really do and it will be a fruitful year ahead

无题。。。

2011-02-05T22:16:00.000+08:00

只想告诉你，对不起
对你的不理不睬，不是因为我讨厌你
只是，我不知道应该怎样面对你
请原谅我的无能为力

Happy Chinese New Year?

2011-02-02T19:36:00.000+08:00

Chinese New Year is here...
No mood... Do not have any New Year mood or feel...
Nothing special, just another usual day...
Will be glad to see all the relatives gather together...
Other than that... I couldn't think of anything else which is special...
Sigh...
What a moody post in such a day which should be so merry...
Anyway...
Happy Chinese New Year everyone...

擦肩而过

2011-01-26T21:10:00.000+08:00

放工，回家的路途
驾着车，独自行驶
看见身旁出现的车
啊...很像是她的车
渐渐的和那车并排

真的是她...
不知道这是难得的缘分
还是上天对我开的玩笑

不知所措...
渐渐的拉开了距离
心，阵阵的酸涩着

关了唱机...
心，开始下沉低落
人，开始胡思乱想

只希望她...
过得好，就足够了
让我继续寂寞好了...

What if...

2011-01-15T20:49:00.000+08:00

What if I'm not a boy...
What if I'm not working my job now...
What if I'm in some other places than here...
What if I'm doing something which I'd never imagine doing before...

What if...

A term which is commonly use, and yet deadly enough...
A term which can create chaos
A term which can flip the world up-side-down
A term which can change the black to white

Really have to stop thinking "what if"
If not, there will be another restless night
Should forget about what may happen and focus on what will happen
Got to pull myself back to reality and stay on the ground...

bad start in 2011

2011-01-06T19:59:00.000+08:00

It's a bad start for 2011...
fully tortured and drained dry by my big big boss and company...
wtf...
no energy to do anything else...
sigh...

Box!!

2010-12-29T21:44:00.000+08:00

One student

One gangster

One interest

One rival

One ring

One battle

These words had summarized the story and the message that this movie try to bring out. It is a story about youth, about the spirit of never give up, about the will to take on challenge...

A student, who is always scoring good result, has a friend who is a gangster... they are friends since young. The student admire his gangster friend very much, especially when he saw him fighting in the ring for boxing championship. In the end, he was inspired to join in the boxing club as well. From a weak-book-worm, he manage to transform himself to become one of the best boxer in high school. Together with his gangster friend, they aim high in winning against the high schools tournament record holder in the coming boxing championship...

A very nice story indeed. very good plotting, entertaining and yet sending a lot of meaningful message at the same time. Watched it during my flight from Italy back to Malaysia on board of the airplane. I'm not sure where can you get it, but I would recommend you guys to have a look at it if you can.

Towards 2011 - Part 2

2010-12-27T22:16:00.002+08:00

Decided to go all out for my job and career next year...
had been lazying around for the past 6 months...
now that I had already confirmed...
is time to try my best and to see how far can I go...
so guys and girls...
please forgive me if I didn't show up myself...
let's hope next year will be the year to kick start my working life...

圣诞节（不）快乐

2010-12-25T01:59:00.000+08:00

笑够...

闹够...

疯够...

玩够...

是时候回到家...

脱下面具...

回归自我...

冷冷的...

淡淡的...

慰藉自己...

祝福着这可悲的自己...

圣诞节...不快乐...

我...寂寞就好

2010-12-23T21:31:00.001+08:00

还是原来那个我...
明知道结果却不愿接受的我
明知道结果却依然做梦的那个我
也许只是单纯的想让自己爱错
也许只是傻傻的想让自己解脱
但是，到最后会有什么？
也许...什么都没有
会得到什么？
也许...什么都得不到
然而，我...还是无法阻止自己
无法克制自己...
全心全意地付出我所能付出的
不求什么...
最后的最后，只留下我一个人...
一个人痛到受不了，伤到快疯掉
这时候...也没有谁来安慰拥抱
被想起的过去，点点滴滴...
化作了雨，润湿了眼底
感叹人生怎可能尽如人意
缘，这个字实在太难猜透
就算相见无期
在某个夜里，我...依然会想起你
虽然我那思念并没有任何用
我那等待也是最傻的承诺
让回忆也变得寂寞...
我...筑起了一层层的保护墙
我...让自己的身心长满了荆棘
我...寂寞就好...

Towards 2011 - Part 1

2010-12-19T22:16:00.000+08:00

Spent some time thinking and thinking... trying my best to plan and organize my life for now. First will go for some of my daily life... slowly I will go for some other things... plan for the coming year of 2011...

Although I'm getting more and more not fit for sports due to several old injuries and new injuries... but still I will spend my time for doing sports, be it badminton or jogging or anything. Have to sweat myself, better than sit there and do nothing everyday. I'll need to get myself a new pair of court shoes...

I will continue in modelling Gundam, although it may not be that often as before, but still... my passion for modelling is still burning inside of me. I will try my best to squeeze out some time to play with it... how far do I want to take my modelling to? I wonder... but for the mean time, I will stick to my current level and move on... maybe joining a modelling competition next year? Well, who knows?

About photography... I guess I will take a slow start instead. I had decided to get myself a G12 instead of DSLR... is not an issue of money, but for now, I want to put my concentration on other things first... when I'm able to give in full determination in photography, then only I will get myself a DSLR. For now, I shall stick with the compact camera and squeeze the most out of it... G12 is more than enough for me right now as I travel a lot and is troublesome to always carry a DSLR around. It is also a "bridge" given to myself, whereby I will try to sharpen my skills further before I hop into the pool of DSLR.

The most important thing that I will focus in... yes, is to learn my guitar. I had already decided to go full throttle on it for next year. I will get myself enroll into a weekly class for sure, and slowly I hope I can get myself play better. I don't want to waste my time anymore... and is time to pay back my relatives expectation for giving me this beautiful guitar. I will try my best, although I might not be able to excel, but at least I want to do the very best that I can for now.

Well, other than all these... will try to improve many other things and aspect in my life... maybe they are minor, but hope that all those minor things will slowly become major in my life which will eventually gives a positive influence. There are still a lot more to think and plan... but no rush... slowly and take it easy... one step at a time...

安息...

2010-12-10T22:33:00.000+08:00

今天报章上看见了一则新闻...一个男生，为爱自杀...对许多人而言，也许只是“另一则自杀新闻”，但是，对我而言可以说是一种冲击。早上听见了同事说他朋友的朋友自杀了...对，就是他了。翻阅着新闻，感觉突然变得十分不安。原来这样的事情，也可以在这么接近自己的身边发生。

突然觉得有些恐惧，害怕着哪一天身边的亲朋戚友也这样轻生...
突然觉得有些伤感，原来人真的可以那么的脆弱...
突然觉得有些惋惜，一个大好青年就这样离开了大家...
突然觉得有些心痛，男生已经走了，但是身边的人还在议论纷纷...

说真的，男生的心情，其实不难了解。当为一个人付出了全部，换回来的却是一句“我爱你，但是我要离开你”...试问谁能够不心碎，谁能够不感觉到绝望。也许是因为曾经有过相同的经历，所以我懂得男生的心情与感受。这，的确不是一般人能够承担得住的伤痛。记得当初，我也是让自己沉沦在泪水里，久久无法自拔。眼泪，流了再多也无法挽回什么。声线，哭到沙哑也不能唤回什么。

事到如今，并不是怪罪男生身边的人没关心他没开解他的时候。
事到如今，并不是怪罪男生的行动到底是无知还是解脱的时候。

事情已经发生了，再怎么疼惜也无法挽回了。对于我们现在依然活着的人而言，我们能够做些什么呢？

多关心身边的人。虽然你未必能够敞开他人的心房，但是至少能够温暖他的肩膀。
多爱惜身边的人。虽然你未必会得到任何回报，但是至少能够填满他的空虚。
多珍惜自己。虽然事事为能如意，但是切记柳暗花明又一村。
多尊重别人的生命。每个人都有权选择生活方式，请别把自己的观念强加于他人身上。

男生找不到出路，选择了离开。也许有人认为这很愚蠢，有人认为是逃避。但是，事到如今，我觉得我们应该做的，就是尊重他的选择，然后希望他能够得到安息。也希望他的家人能够早日平复情绪，收拾心情，勇敢地，连男生的份...也一起...好好的活下去。

不断的心弦

2010-12-05T18:13:00.000+08:00

写了新的故事，有兴趣的人或得空没事做的人可以去看看...
点击右边的My Stories，然后再点击故事的标题就可以了...
更懒惰的人，直接点击这里好了...
希望大家会喜欢，会被感动。
谢谢。

Italy... an amazing journey

2010-12-04T18:54:00.000+08:00

Well, never really thought of heading to Europe in my life... yet. And never ever thought of it would be this early... anyway, it turns out that I need to go for a business trip to Italy for 1 week. It's so sudden that I got no idea how should I react. A rush in preparing for the winter, and there I'd already boarded the midnight flight all the way to Milan. I do transit at Amsterdam, which I believe is another nice city (well, at least the airport is nice...) but since I'd just hang around for few hours in he airport, so nothing much I can tel about it.

The moment of my arrival to Milan wasn't so impressive actually. Touch down at Malpensa International Airport, but honestly the airport looks old even though it is just about 5 years old. Maybe this is their unique design that doesn't suit my taste? Have some upset moment when dealing with a waitress in a restaurant... Anyway, met up with Marco, one of my company's distributor at the airport while waiting for my colleague from Dubai to touch down an hour later. Have a nice chat with him while trying to get myself comfortable with the new environment. Jet-lag? Well, not really. I got a whole 14 hours of time during my flight to adjust myself according to the time zone. After my colleague landed, we head to the hotel in Assago, Royal Garden Hotel.

The next day, our distributor, Mr Francesco and Ms Paula pick us up to their office for a cup of Italian Espresso. It is very aromatic, but indeed it was too heavy for me and my colleague. Italian just like to drink such a concentrated cafe. We then head on to Turin, where we will have our meetings with other dealers and technicians for the upcoming training. There's about 20 of them, and they are really some nice and friendly guy. A bit of admiring them, as they gave me the feel of "work hard, play hard, eat hard, and enjoy every moment in your life". During the five days of training, which my colleague and I were their trainer for giving them training on my company's product, I think I'd learnt a lot from them, far more than what they had learnt from me I guess. Well, it is a nice experience indeed.

After the 5 days training ended, we head back to Milan and stayed back in the same hotel. The next day was Saturday, we woke up early in the morning and checking up what we can do for the day in Milan. Francesco and Paula pick us up from the hotel and we head for San Siro Stadium, the home for AC Milan and Inter Milan Football Club. From the outside, the stadium looks huge, but when we get inside, the feeling was totally different. One may start to wonder why the stadium feels smaller when you are inside... anyway, this is perhaps something good as it means when you are watching a match in the stadium, you are much closer to the footballers. A tour around the stadium and the changing room... follow by the museum which host all the trophies and jersey... it is a nice trip, even though I'm not a die-hard-fan but still I can feel the stream of emotion running in everyone's body.

Next, we head for a very nice lunch in Milan town center. Milan, far more artistic than you can ever imagine. Every building, every street, every corner, everywhere... you can feel the sense of art, sense of history, sense of heading back to the 90's, 80's and 70's... by the time we finish our lunch, it's already past 2pm. Our distributors decided to let us free to travel around as we like, and we really appreciate it. We first entered the Duomo Church, a really holly and magnificence place which everyone shouldn't miss. The design, the statue, the lights, the prayer, the decoration... everything is just perfect inside Duomo, is like we are entering to another dimension in the world. Next stop, we head for the Galleria Vittorio Emanuele II, a shopping distinct to be precise. You can find a lot of nice shops and nice items here... but you must be able to have the money to spend as well. We went to the Via Dante next, another street for some shopping spree... and ends up at Castello Sforzesco, which is an ancient castle. Throughout the journey, we were greeted by snow... first time to see it in my life of 24 years. Well, honestly, it's not really that special. We'd been imagining too much and put a lot of fantasy in snowing... but when you are in it... it is just... snow.

Since we are no longer touring with our distributors, we have to find our ways back to our hotel. So we get our ass in the local subway which is called "Metro" and head to Famagosta, the nearest town to Assago. Then we take a bus and journey back to our hotel. The next day, we took the subway again from Famagosta to Cardona, and then we transit for Malpensa Express which ride us all the way to the Malpensa Airport. For our last few moments in the express train, we were farewelled by heavy snow... indeed it is very nice to see the whole world in white... but it is something that the local hate the most as they will have trouble getting around with their cars. Arrive at the airport, checked-in, do some last minute shopping, board the plane and ready to adjust my body-clock back to Malaysia time... by the time I leave Italy it was the evening, the sky is still bright. While the plane head towards Kuala Lumpur, I stared outside of my window... I was amazed by the scenery I saw outside. The sky is in half, a side is bright while another is dark. My flight is flying from the bright sky zone and entering the dark sky zone... slowly, slowly... the whole process last for about half an hour until the plane had finally entered totally into the night. Speechless, and I'm a little regret for not taking the pictures of it. Hope that there will be a second chance for me to do so.

Throughout the whole week in Italy, I found that Italians are very friendly towards Italians. Even if they don't know each other. I'd found that there are Italians that are very helpful to travelers who doesn't speak Italian language. And of course there are less friendly one. Italian food is simply superb. Their wine is something I believe cannot be found else where. A week stay in Italy, three hours of tour in Milan... everything just seems doesn't enough. Hopefully I'll have the chance to drop by again someday. To explore more on Italian food, to snap more pictures of the buildings, to learn more of the Italian culture...

And I'd almost forgot a very nice scene which I saw when heading to the factory back in Turin. We passed by a school everyday, not sure is it a primary school or kindergarten. It is not the type of school you'll see in Malaysia. It is a house, with a lot of windows, and everyday when I head to the factory, I can see parents are standing outside of the gate and starring at their children who were studying in the school through the windows... every time I see it, it warms my heart during the cold winter. A very nice scene that I regret for unable to snap it with my camera.

Well, that pretty much wrap up my experience of staying one week in Italy. My first stay in Europe as well, and it doesn't disappoint me, not at all. You may browse the pictures I'd taken through my facebook. For those who are planning to head to Milan, need not to worry as travelling in Milan is very easy and convenient. And honestly I'm starting to miss the atmosphere and food right now... till then, Ciao~

Italiano Craze

2010-11-27T04:17:00.000+08:00

After 1 whole week in Italy... some of the things I observed about Italy were:

Italian will die without coffee
They will drink an extremely "kaw" espresso in the morning, during the morning tea break, after lunch, during the evening tea break, after dinner, and even after supper... I drink one in the morning breakfast and my head is spinning whole day long >.<

Italian eats a lot... I mean A LOT
Yes, there will be bread on the table before meal for you to eat... then there will be the appetizer (which consist of meats, cheese, vegetables and etc), follow my FIRST course which usually is PASTA or spaghetti or rice... and there comes your MAIN course of meat, fish, pork or chicken... you are not finish yet! There are still dessert waiting for you...

The land of house wine
Yes, every town, every city, every village produce their very own taste of wine... get ready to drink wine for every single meal and indulge yourself in their great taste...

Naturale vs Frizzante
You might not know what are these, but I shall tell you they are water. These are the two types of water you will find in everywhere in Italy. Naturale basically is the usual water we drink daily. Frizzante however is gassed water... local people are crazy for Frizzante as they don't like "tasteless" natural water. Well, others usually dislike the slight bitter sour taste of the Frizzante...

Land of GREAT food
When I say great food, I really mean it. Even when you step into a lousy looking stall, you will get very fine food in Italy. This is because they are very particular with what they eat. So, get yourself ready for some weight gain when visiting Italy for all the good pasta, pizza and spaghetti... and there are more than that!

Italian Goal
Football is almost like everything in Italian's life during weekend... very much like EPL for English people. Stadium will get crowded, traffic will jam... it is indeed a festival for them every week to see the football match.

The Italian
Italian are very friendly... with other Italian... with foreigners however is depends on individual. Some are very friendly and will try to approach you even he got no idea what you are saying and you got no idea what they are saying as well... but some are a little "cold"...

Well, that's all I can figure out for the time being. Will update if there's anything else... Ciao!

KL -> Italy

2010-11-20T19:38:00.000+08:00

Leaving home in few minutes time...
Departing from KLIA to Italy soon...
14 hours of flight... sigh... 2 and a half hours to Sabah is already killing me...
Wonder how to spend my 14 hours...
Anyway, another chance to test out my limit...
In my work, in my "freezing point"...
In my life, in my mind...
It's going to be a long whole week in Italy...

My limit

2010-11-04T19:57:00.000+08:00

How far can I go...
How high can I jump...
How hard can I fall...
How long can I last...
How well can I do...
How great can I be...

I would like to find out... all of them...
bit by bit... a step at a time...

October Over

2010-10-30T22:00:00.000+08:00

Yup... time flies... all of a sudden October is all over. Indeed a very busy month with all sorts of things going on... and life become so unorganized as well. Begins with a boost whereby heading to Genting for a concert... follow by 1 whole week of meeting with our distributors and dealers... then follow by the boring convocation... then site visits... then again another week of meetings...

Anyway, hope my life will get back to it's original form in November. it's been a long time I didn't practice my guitar... it's been a long while I didn't really rest in my home... it's been a long while I didn't watch movie do anything that I like... after busy entertaining distributors... wasting my time in convocation... meeting all sorts of people where some are nice and some are shit...

For the whole month... eat buffet till now I'm scared of it... stay hotel till I'm boring with it... many things had learnt, and many things had run through my mind. A whole new experience, a whole new stage... hope all of this will back me up and move on strong in the coming months...

路标

2010-10-23T18:40:00.000+08:00

如果你被告知你的生命只剩下一天，也就是24小时...你会做些什么？

现在的我，也许会好好把玩我的高达模型，弹弹我的吉他，翻翻橱里的杂志，和家人聊聊天，和喜欢的人告个白，和朋友说声再见...就这样度过安详而不会太过伤感的最后一天吧...

《逝纸》这一部电影，说的就是这样的一个故事。为了警惕世人珍惜时光，好好发挥自己，爱惜家人，政府定下了法律：人群中会有人被选中“为了国家而献出生命，为的是让活着的人能更积极”。一个很无稽的法律，但是故事中三个被告知只剩下24小时的人，却活出了不一样的最后一天，也为身边的人带来了不一样的影响。虽然故事架构好像很不合逻辑，但是静心探讨过中的意义...确实有一种莫名的感动。

送给大家的，是这电影的主题曲。听着，然后想想看你会怎样利用拿最后的24小时吧...

Michi shirube | Upload Music

道しるべ

PhilHarmoUniQue

过不久就是我的生日
只不过是蛋糕上又多了根蜡烛
前后左右压在肩上的事情
在这天平上我内心摇摆不定

虽然讨厌斗争
但心中却一直拿着手枪指着谁
即便退下别人也想站上的领奖台
想要得到什么，又有什么目标

所有人都在现实中寻找着路标

活着到底意味着什么
是斗争到底，还是逃避下去
到底怎样做才正确
是为了保护永不出错，还是坚持自己永不迷失

眼泪流干了，笑多了脸上反增加皱纹
和心爱的人一起背负的重担令我直不起身
挣扎的想要追求幸福
挣扎的想要使人幸福

尽管如此，偶尔也会有忘却时候

关怀到底是什么？
是宽宏还是反之待人严厉
爱又是什么？
是体谅而已，还是尽力隐藏起那份疑心

虽然无法躲过那些风风雨雨
但我也终归会为人引路

活着到底意味着什么
是斗争到底，还是逃避下去
现在向前迈出一步
不是踏向死亡一步，而是迈向生存的一步

现在我要唱的歌
虽然有些羞愧，但仍希望能打动他人的心
这就是我的路标…

十四天的遐想

2010-10-17T09:56:00.000+08:00

两个星期没有更新部落格了
工作繁忙是一点，懒惰是另一点
回想这两个星期内有什么可写的事情...
看来，还是离不开我的心情。
两个星期了，感觉依然还是残留着
还是那么的强烈，那么的陶醉

还记得从火车站出发，直到那天晚上...直到现在
我，都是一个人渡过。
当阿哲问道：“有没有人用过我的歌，追到身边的另一半”的时候
手，情不自禁的握紧了一下
原来我的手心里，没握着别人的手
这种似乎已经习惯了的孤单，冰冷得可怕

“有个人想我就好，向被月光拥抱，你悄悄住进我的心灵城堡...”
“每个人都有一段悲伤，想隐藏，却在生长...”
“没有你，房子变得好乱，伤心的雨不停落...”
“明知不该去想，不能去想，却又想到迷惘...”
“我发现我在安静无声的掉泪，这才明白被伤得有多重...”
“这里有空位，你要不要占缺？”

阿哲的歌，陪我走过的只有一段又一段的悲伤
一段又一段想放弃却又无法忘记的遗憾
究竟何时，我...才能从阿哲的悲伤情歌里毕业
究竟何时，我...才能把现在的心情变成回忆
究竟何时，我...紧握的手心才不会是冰冷的
究竟何时，我...才能够...看见晴天...

寻找...张信哲

2010-10-03T21:11:00.001+08:00

还记得小时候，家人买了一个卡带回家，是“滚石巨星精选”之类的，有周华健，赵传，陈升和他的歌曲。卡带里是四个人各四首歌曲，听完后，就深深地被他的歌给吸引住了。还记得那四首歌曲是《我是真的爱你》，《难以抗拒你容颜》，《爱如潮水》和《别怕我伤心》。当时还小，不懂得“追星”，只是会每一天不断的重复着播放那卡带...

后来，大姐买了他的专辑，他加入EMI唱片公司后的首张专辑...《宽容》。虽然说是我姐姐买回来的，但是我听那卡带的次数远远超越家里任何一个人。接着下来便是难得的广东专辑《深情》，然后就是《梦想》，《思念》，《挚爱》... 后来还从亲戚家里挖来了他在滚石唱片时的卡带，当中更不乏许多经典歌曲，比如《让我忘记你的脸》，《我们爱这个错》，《我最爱的女人》，《曾经爱过》，《有一点动心》等... 加入了Sony Music后的他，接着发行了《直觉》，《到处留情》，《回来》，《信仰》和《从开始到现在》的专辑。过后当然少不了《我好想》，《做你的男人》，《下一个永远》，《雪国八月》，《逃生》和他2010年最新专辑《初_专辑》。

他，是大家所熟悉的情歌王子
他，陪大家度过了许多甜蜜与欢乐
他，慰藉了许许多多受了伤的心灵
他的歌声，永远不会变质
他的歌曲，永远那么动听
他的情感，永远感动澎湃
他...就是张信哲。

他的歌曲，几乎我都会唱，会唱的几乎都记得歌词。原因很简单：
“我不希望唱一些很难唱的歌曲，我不希望我的歌会让大家就算看着歌词也未必能够唱的出来。这样的歌曲，会失去了它的意义，会传达不到它的故事。所以我的歌，歌词都很简单，但是却能带出令人深思的故事。”

“唱歌最重要的，并不是跟随商业的步伐去改变自己，去迁就别人的口味，这样就失去了歌曲本来的意义。唱歌最重要的，是把歌曲里的故事，用尽自己的情感，好好把它给演练出来。这样，大家听了才会一样被感动。我一直都相信着，歌手就像是一个说故事的人。”

“虽然还是会有新的年轻歌迷会去听我的歌，但是说白了，我还是必须想想陪伴了我那么久的歌迷现在到底想听到怎样的音乐。求学时期开始听我歌的，现在已经在职场打滚了吧？单身时听我歌的人，也许已经有了家庭吧？所以每次做音乐时，我都会用心去想一想。这二十年来，回首看望，欣慰着自己能够继续坚持的做着自己喜欢和想要的音乐。未来的日子，我还是会继续的努力，把最好的音乐带给大家。”

一段精简的采访报道，却显而易见的看出了他和其他歌手的不同。

在报章上看到了这广告，于是我终于下了决心：好，我要去看他的演唱会！从购买演唱会门票到住宿和巴士车票...其实可以说是一波三折的。无论如何，最后还是把所有的事项都安排好了。十月二日，早上八时正，我，独自一个人，展开了这“寻找...张信哲”的旅程...

从Kepong KTM 出发，到达KL Sentral 后，转搭巴士到云顶缆车站。路上，一个韩国妇女坐在我旁边，带着她的儿子和女儿到云顶去玩。到达了缆车站，由于缆车正在进行维修，所以只好改乘 Shuttle Bus...终于在午饭时间抵达了云顶的First World Hotel。虽然我并不是住在这里，但是巴士只能在这里下车。吃过午饭，拿起了相机到处闲逛拍照。走着，来到了我下榻的酒店，Theme Park Hotel。进了房间，本来打算睡一个午觉，但是却睡不着。开了电视也没能专心看。眼睛总是会情不自禁的偷瞄以下手表...“现在到底是几点了？”

冲了凉，换了衣，吃了晚饭。好不容易七点了。来到了云星剧场的入口，顺利的通过了。入口处只见售卖各式各样的荧光棒，口哨等的物品...还是算了吧。终于，我在我的座位上坐了下来。眼睛还是忍不住不断的看着手上的手表...我觉得我应该比在后台的阿哲还要紧张吧？第一次一个人来到了这个可以算是“陌生”的地方（上一次来云顶已经是中一的事了吧？），第一次看演唱会，还有就是第一次踏上所谓的“追星”的旅程...

还有五分钟...这是台上有着一个简单的舞蹈表演，但是我的心根本就不在这里。五分钟后，台上屏幕进入倒数，5...4...3...2...1... 然后切换了一段短篇。短篇里有五个男女，有职场高手，有蜜恋中的情侣，有失恋的人，有寂寞的人，有孤独的人...大家处在不一样的地点，但是都听着同一首歌...就是张信哲的《信仰》... 接着，五人开始哼唱复歌，阿哲就在这时...来到了台上，高唱起这首情歌。

第一次面对面的看到了情歌王子，第一次让我们之间的距离近得能够用几米来计算。一时之间，我，无言以对。那种心情，那种感觉，在演唱会结束后都依然那么的强烈，那么的无法忘怀...一口气唱出了几首经典的他，简短的说了几句话：

“大家可以在屏幕上看到歌词的字幕，但这并不是要让大家检查看我是不是有唱错了歌词，而是想让大家都能够和我一起唱。让我们把这演唱会馆变成最大的卡拉OK厢房，好吗？”

演唱会是以回顾阿哲过去二十年的形式进行着。从他出道的第一张专辑（1989年）到2010年，每一张专辑里的经典歌曲都被唱了出来。之间还穿插了回顾阿哲所有专辑的录像，还有他当年跑通告的画面以及他演过的电影画面。唱到轻快的歌曲时，阿哲会努力的和舞伴一起又唱又跳，但是当悲伤的音乐一响起来，他却又能够立刻投入情绪，把最动人，最真挚的情歌给演绎出来，全场表现只能用100分来点评。

“这场演唱会标志着我这二十年的里程碑。但是，这并不是一个结束。这只会是另一个阶段的开始。我会继续努力，把最好的歌曲，带给大家。”

“今天在酒店走着，看见我演唱会的海报。上面贴着一个大大的SOLD OUT。突然内心觉得有一点点地骄傲，哈哈。”

到场的观众，低至儿童，高至中年人，座无虚席，而且大家都大声地和阿哲一起唱足了三小时。安歌部分，阿哲从后台步出来时说道：
“还好大家都还没走，刚才说了谢谢后好怕大家就这样回去了。”
这时台下已经有人开始大喊：“阿哲！爱如潮水！”
“什么？想听爱如潮水吗？才没那么容易被你听到哦！”

最后，在谢过了主办商和赞助商，阿哲向在场的歌迷郑重地致谢。
“还有还有还有，就是不得不感谢把门票都抢光光的你们。谢谢。最后，送给大家的最后一首歌，爱如潮水。”
依然是全场大合唱，在阿哲的鞠躬和现场的舞台效果下，幸福觉哲世界巡回演唱会就这样圆满的结束。

没有华丽的舞台，没有奢华的造型，没有泛滥的舞台效果。有的，只是阿哲最真挚的歌声，最动听的旋律，最感人的歌曲。离开了演唱会馆，回到房间，躺在床上，久久都无法入眠。感动，落泪，心中的激动久久都无法平息。外面开始下起了连绵细雨，似乎连老天爷也被他的歌声给感动了。

最后，回到了家，回到了现实。阿哲的歌，还是会继续陪伴着我走过各种风雨。期待着将来的情歌王子。等待着张信哲的下一个动人演出。谢谢你。

good bye day...

2010-10-02T05:39:00.000+08:00

Will gone missing in action...
Goodbye everyone...
Goodbye Blogspot...
Goodbye...

... ... ... ...

2010-09-28T20:19:00.000+08:00

I'm a string in maximum tension for now...
Anything happen I will break...
If anyone comes and bother me...
I will give a vigorous respond...
So tighten... and yet there's no way to loose it...
Please just cut me into pieces...

肩膀 - 张信哲

2010-09-26T19:37:00.000+08:00

他，选择了与商业背道而驰。
他，舍弃了连看着歌词也跟不上的节奏感。
他，把所有感情融入歌曲中。
他，把歌曲背后的故事毫无瑕疵的演绎出来。
他，和大家一样渐渐成长。
他，让大家找到了一个能慰藉心灵的声音。
他，一次又一次的唱出了你我他的爱情。

这是另一首将会继续成为经典的情歌...

肩膀

词：梁锦兴曲：黄慧雯演唱：张信哲

或许寂寞会让人不安

思念敲门的时候总觉得慌张

但你的模样是时间冲不淡

还是自己的潜意识在倔强

任性是你曾有的翅膀

失去你感觉像失去一座避风港

此刻受了伤你给过的希望

还能往哪里找加油站

靠着我的肩膀是你戒不掉的习惯

两个人的天亮你有我的温度取暖

靠着我的肩膀就能抵住了全部风寒

再多曾经的伤感都在我的背弯安静的柔软平躺

靠着我的肩膀还能依偎在谁身旁

失去的安全感午夜梦回倍感慌张

靠着我的肩膀幸福感觉的理所当然

再多拥抱都徒然谁给的都没有我的那温暖

思绪那么极端

笑着的时候眼泪总是防不胜防

离开我的肩膀时间原来比我想象中还长

Shoulder by Jeff Chang | Upload Music

中秋节不快乐

2010-09-22T20:52:00.000+08:00

回想第一年进大学的今天，我感染了宿舍上下的华人都一起点灯笼，玩蜡烛...
四年后的今天，我...到底在做些什么？
昨晚结果还是梦见了不想梦见的东西...
三天了...到底怎么了？
也许是因为从睡醒到睡前的时间都在想着工作的事情
已经没有胡思乱想的时间
结果...就惟有在睡觉的时候
开始胡思乱想，开始做梦...
结果每天仿佛没睡到那样
为什么要这样折磨我...
真的越来越害怕入睡了...

害怕入睡

2010-09-21T21:33:00.000+08:00

对，害怕入睡
为什么？
因为已经两晚了...
入睡后就开始做梦...
梦，是多么的真实
与现实是多么的相近
就这样，梦着，一直到被闹钟惊醒
原来是梦，还好是梦
但是，拖着疲惫的身体，起床上班
心，开始变得不平静
思绪，开始变得动荡不安
害怕这梦会真的变成现实
千万不要...千万不要...
害怕着...如果可以不必入眠就好了...
我不想再梦见那么残酷的事情...
但愿今晚就这样...失眠好了...

Tsubasa wo kudasai...

2010-09-18T19:53:00.001+08:00

Tsubasa wo kudasai... in Japanese it means "give me wings"...

Yes, please give me wings to fly... a very nicely written lyrics and this song had been sang by a whole lot of different singer, a whole lot of different version out there... the one I'm posting here... I dare not say that everyone can accept the vocals... but I like the feeling it gave me when listening to it... of course with the visual effect from the movie as well, Evangelion 2.22 You Can (Not) Advance.

Feel free to search for other version if you like this song.

English Translation:

If my wish
Could be granted now, I’d want wings.
Please put on my back
White wings, like a bird’s.

In this vast sky, I want to spread my wings
And fly.
Into the sky, free and without sadness,
I want to flap my wings.

Now, I don’t need wealth or prestige,
But I want wings.
The dream I had when I was a child -
Even now, I’m looking at the same dream.

In this vast sky, I want to spread my wings
And fly.
Into the sky, free and without sadness,
I want to flap my wings.

In this vast sky, I want to spread my wings
And fly.
Into the sky, free and without sadness,
I want to flap my wings.

In this vast sky, I want to spread my wings
And fly.
Into the sky, free and without sadness,
I want to flap my wings.
In this vast sky, I want to spread my wings
And fly.
Into the sky, free and without sadness,
I want to flap my wings.

Tsubasa wo kudasai | Music Codes

田馥甄 - To Hebe

2010-09-15T21:17:00.000+08:00

今年出专辑的歌手有许多，目前为止已经几乎所有当红的都出了。不过，最近难得有空听了几张...除了强力推荐张信哲的新专辑，接下来必须介绍的就是这张《To Hebe》专辑。说真的，什么天王周杰伦，天后蔡依琳都必须靠边站。他们的新专辑真的是听不听都罢，因为他们的音乐已经变成了一种“习惯”，我想说的，是听着他们的歌，只能感受到浓厚的商业味道。他们的歌已经没有了灵魂，没有了内涵，没有了感情。

Hebe的这张单飞专辑，说真的，非常成功。完全让人感受到她的努力，她的力量，她的情感。一直以来，SHE里都只看好她一个，这次证明了我的眼光再次没有出错了。不做作，只有诚恳地耕耘出最完美的首张个人专辑。期待着她能够继续努力，不要好像那些所谓的当红大明星，被这商业的洪流给掩埋。

无题。

2010-09-09T23:06:00.000+08:00

最近反复的听着这两首歌...苏打绿的无眠...张信哲的空位...感觉上两首歌的歌词好像刺到了我的心上，觉得疼痛，流着血，但是却又无法抗拒让自己沉溺其中。把自己关在一个人的房间里，也许真的是错误的选择，因为自然而然就会开始胡思乱想，开始消沉，开始流泪。

从今天开始就已经是假期，直到下星期五才开工。这一个星期将会显得更加的漫长...决定了找两天回到公司去，虽然是假期，但是还是回去两天比较好。可以拿处理公事为一个借口，好让自己逃避那些期盼，那些幻想，那些现实...步出自己的房间，忘却身边的那个空位...

害怕着在数年以后，当自己回头看看自己时，会猛然发觉自己已变成了只能用工作来麻醉自己的丑陋生物。但是，现在的我，还是无能为力，最后的最后，还是只能不断地逃避，不断地把自己埋葬在单纯的思念与回忆里，直到沦陷，直到失眠，直到已无法后退，无法挽回...

初＿专辑 - 张信哲

2010-09-07T05:55:00.001+08:00

身处这样的时代，在不同的大都会中流转，你身边却始终保持着，一个空位…

离开了一座城市，抵达另一座城市，我和你擦身而过的瞬间，依靠过，然后又分离
就像才刚刚挥别了昨天，今天又紧接而来，一个人去体会另一个似曾相似的，日出到日落。

「傍晚走出机场，搭上开往市区的出租车，我一个人拖着行李，上了六楼，窝进沙发看着热闹的电视节目，吃着一个人的晚餐，为你留了左手边的位子…」

「在半夜踏进诚品，穿梭在陌生人间翻阅着当期的新书…再走进旁边24小时的咖啡店，坐在靠窗边的位子，拿出手机逛了逛网页，替你留了面对面的位子…」

我们身处这样的时代，在不同的大都会中流转，

身边却始终保持着一个空位…

捷运里蓝色的塑料椅．公园的跷跷板．大树下的长凳…

客厅的灰色沙发．咖啡厅里促膝而坐的木椅…

“是这城市习惯了双数？还是自己习惯了双数？“

我们总是把「都会」和「爱情」划上等号，

却常常在都会里找不到，爱情的双数。

近年总是忙于工作的阿哲，奔波在世界各个城市，走遍了各地的舞台进行表演，对于感情也许一再转身错过了，也许从没真正发现过...

可是，我们却习惯叫着他「情歌王子」、习惯把他的歌当作知己，就像最初的老朋友一般，我们见面寒暄用歌里的深刻互相对话，我们投射彼此内心深处的情感反射，甚至已经渐渐习惯，毫不掩饰的借着他的歌来取暖。

踏进了出道的第21个年头，张信哲再一次用他无可取代的温暖与深情，唱【初＿专辑】中一首首爱情歌颂，一句句诚恳告白。

陪你告别、陪你痊愈、陪你慢慢归零…

陪你回到最初，重新出发！寻找心中那个等待填上的完美双数...

听过了这专辑，一个很“阿哲”的专辑。情歌王子终于回归了最初的自己，最初的音乐，最初的情感，最初的感动...2010年里，难得的一张好专辑。希望大家也能够被他的歌声，歌词，旋律与音乐感动。在这里介绍给大家，我听了一遍又一遍的歌...空位。非常有意思的歌词，希望大家也会被感动。

空位

张信哲

遥控器按整个晚上
又一张很空旷的双人床
打开了网页到处逛
又一杯独享的冷咖啡香

我已习惯
每个城市都独来独往
但还是渴望偶而有人在身旁

这里有空位你要不要占缺
不用刻意把我当成你的谁
请再坐近一点将陌生感消灭
然后就像情人那样体贴
心里的空位我很乐意出借
霸占我的世界不轻易让位
奔波这么多年我也想停在某一天
诚实的面对所有爱恋不胆怯

寂寞有多少的重量
不快乐该不该继续假装
我已习惯
每个城市都別来无恙
看起來一样却不同方向

这里有空位你要不要占缺
不用刻意把我当成你的谁
请再坐近一点将陌生感消灭
然后就像情人那样体贴
心里的空位我很乐意出借
霸占我的世界不轻易让位
奔波这么多年我也想停在某一天
诚实的面对所有爱恋不胆怯

Empty space by Jeff Chang | Music Codes

无眠(国语版) - 苏打绿

2010-09-05T08:19:00.000+08:00

这首歌...看来非常的适合我...歌名“无眠”也好，歌词也好...都和我产生了不谋而合的共鸣。反复的听着...感觉就越渐强烈。也许一个人的时候总会就这样开始胡思乱想，但是也许会比两个人的时候的互相伤害来得好吧...至少现在痛的苦的累的，就只有我自己一个...一首寂寞的歌，献给这么一个寂寞的我...

今夜的月光超載太重
照著我一夜哄不成夢
每根頭發都失眠

天空他究竟在思念誰
是不是都和我一樣
揮不去昨日甜美的細節
才讓今天又淪陷
你現在想著誰有沒有和我相同的感覺
固執等著誰卻驚覺已無法倒退
曾經想一起飛在自己心中蓋了座花園
把你的一切都種在這個地點
卻像魚守在里面
不管要多少時間多少眼淚多少落空來等待
不管你是不是會回來
其實我也不明白為什么如此傻傻地期盼
你是我僅有的愛
像條魚守在里面
守著幻影葬在里面

Sleepless by Sodagreen | Music Codes

Tired...

2010-09-02T20:01:00.000+08:00

Tired...
Physically tired...
Back pain has never gone from me...
Although the short sickness has recovered...
But still I'm already tortured by it...

Tired...
Mentally tired...
Need to think and plan a lot of things now...
Need to worry a lot more things than usual...
Doesn't matter it is work or life...

Tired...
Spiritually tired...
Still feeling a bit lost...
Still searching for what I really want...
Still being a coward and dare not advance...

Tired...
I'm really tired...
Perhaps exhausted...

sleepless night

2010-08-26T04:12:00.000+08:00

3am in the morning... and I'm awake from my sleep
Damn... I can't fall asleep after that
There's no one around me
No one I can reach
No one I can look for
No one I can rely on
No one I can talk to
No one I can hug to
No one I can receive some comfort from
Yes, I'm all alone... in this sleepless night...

August ending...

2010-08-18T20:18:00.000+08:00

Met a whole lot of new people... some are nice... some are not so...
Learn a whole lot of new things... some are useful... some are not so...
My August training will come to an end soon...
Although there are much more that I'm expecting from this training...
But I got no choice but to accept and appreciate what I got so far...
Next month onwards, hope that I can really pick up my pace...
And start to adapt myself fully in my job...
That's all I can worry about now...

A Pissed-ful August...

2010-08-08T18:41:00.000+08:00

Sigh... wonder why August begins with so shit-ly... change in new environment for work place, home and life style already very tiring... then come along with all sorts of family dinners and etc... and the company annual dinner some more... totally exhausted just to entertain everyone... feels like want to yell out loud to the world "LEAVE ME ALONE!!"

Already tired from everyday work... visiting sites and dealing with issues, people and other stuffs everyday is draining all my energy away... a family dinner which should be something enjoyable... ended up to be a rather torturing and frustrating one for me in the end... the timing for everything is just not right at all... what to do but just go on with it... is a family gathering after all... but the most PISSED ME OFF thing will be the company annual dinner... I WILL NOT ATTEND IT ANYMORE IN THE FUTURE!!

First, I wasn't a committee member, but since one of the colleague from my department is, and she asked for my help, so OK, even though I'm already tired of rushing for family gathering in the morning at Rawang, then lunch at Sungai Buloh, then fly all the way to Shah Alam for the dinner... my job is simple, just guide people to their respective table for seating... but again, from 4pm until 6pm standing and serving people... even more tired now... then when dinner starts, found out that the 6 seats which should be belong to me and a few of my colleague who also busy as a committee members, was taken by a bunch of BULL SHIT GOD DAMN MALAY BITCH... never mind, maybe they are just seated wrongly, that's all. So ask them which table they are originally in so that I can bring them to their assigned table... they just sitting there saying they should be sitting that table. FUCK OFF! YOU THINK I DONNO THAT TABLE SHOULD HAVE WHO SITTING IN IT? SOME MORE THE TABLE SEATING IS CLEARLY WRITTEN ON THE INVITATION CARD!! Then one of my colleague asked for their invitation card to see their seating, and none of them respond to him, just ignore him showing "black face"... then one of the BITCH say their place were seated by other people. OK, NEVER MIND... although this is obviously a LAME REASON... I ASSUME THE BITCH DO TELL THE TRUTH, alright, so we got no choice but to search for other table since THOSE MALAY BITCH DO NOT WAT TO MOVE THEIR CHI BAI ASS FROM THE CHAIR. So we discuss where should we sit... but we worried that if we sit on other table, later we will become the one who had sit in other people place as there is a possibility that they are late... while we discussing, suddenly THREE OF THE SIX BITCH STAND UP AND WALK ANGRILY AWAY TO ANOTHER TABLE TO SIT... AND GUESS WHAT THOSE MALAY BITCH DID? THEY PURPOSELY BUMP US WITH THEIR SHOULDER WHEN THEY PASSED BY!! WHAT THE FUCK? HONESTLY SAYING, if this is not company dinner, I WILL DEFINITELY SLAP THAT 3 BITCHES ON THE SPOT!! KURANG AJAR BETUL! IS THIS WHAT ISLAM IS TEACHING MUSLIMS TO BEHAVE LIKE?? I know the answer is certainly not, BUT THESE 3 MALAY BITCHES IS JUST OUT OF THE UNIVERSE FOR BEHAVING LIKE BARBARIAN... WE DIDN'T EVEN SAID ANY WORD OF ASKING THEM TO LEAVE THE TABLE, no point to do so as they already used all the spoon, fork and cup... AND ALL OF THE SUDDEN THIS HAPPENED...

GREAT... I MUST SAY THEY REALLY MADE THE MALAYS IN MALAYSIA SO "PROUD"... what a SHAME... NEVER MIND... this is just a lesson for me to learn... NO NEXT TIME IN ANY OTHER SUCH EVENT IN FUTURE FOR ME ANYMORE!! I HAD ENOUGH!!

Last day of July

2010-07-31T20:30:00.000+08:00

Yup... today is the last day of July... nothing special, just stay home and take some rest... already one and a half month working... so far there are still a whole lot of things to catch up. Really hope that I can get independent as soon as possible and stop giving others trouble. August, for the whole month I will be station in one of my company's distributor's HQ, YORK. Office is situated in Damansara Uptown... not a familiar place for me at all, but I will try my best to survive for this month and hope to learn as much as possible... hopefully it will be helpful for my job in future time... and I will move to stay with my sister in Mutiara Damansara for the month of August too since it will be closer to the work place...

Miss the schooling life? not really... what I miss the most is all those activities I joined or organized during Uni life... tonight there will be the 2nd Japanese Cultural Night in UMS... I'd organized the first one and this year is the second one... wonder how's everything going on... hope that everything will be fine... pray for my juniors for their success. Friends are all busy with their own life... have to start get use to lonely life now... although I am so use to it... but still will get uncomfortable with it...

Just hope August will be a good month... and September onwards will be even better.

我只是想要

2010-07-20T21:57:00.000+08:00

我只是想要…

在伤心的时候，有个人能够让我拥抱

我只是想要…

在无助的时候，有个人能够让我依靠

我只是想要…

在寒冷的时候，有个人能够让我取暖

我只是想要…

在寂寞的时候，有个人能够陪在我身旁

我只是想要…

在临睡的时候，有个人能够想想我就好

我只是想要…

在开心的时候，有个人能够和我一起欢笑

我只是想要…

在失落的时候，有个人能够让我从新振作

我只是想要…

在空虚的时候，有个人能够填满我的心灵

我只是想要…

在临终的时候，有个人能够和我白头偕老

我只是想要…

在睡醒的时候，有个人能够进入我的眼帘就好

我只是想要…

我…只是那么单纯的想要…但是却还是始终到不了…

无题

2010-07-13T20:33:00.000+08:00

夜深人静

独自看着时钟，嘀嗒嘀嗒的

已经是凌晨时分，却完全没有任何睡意

望着电脑荧幕，右手托在滑鼠上

但是却连Facebook也没心情玩

痴呆了一阵，开始放空了视线与思绪

但是，渐渐的，大脑开始像旋转木马一样

许多烦恼，琐碎事，问题，开始在脑子里盘旋

想着，心情越是低落

想着，越是难以入眠

这时，想起了家里的那瓶威士忌

于是，拿了杯子，加了冰块，倒了一杯

喝了一口，味道十分强烈

灼热的燃烧着我的喉咙，然后缓缓地沿烧至肚子

原来纯威士忌的味道是这样的

就像我的心情，我的烦恼一样

在我体内燃烧，然后慢慢蔓延开来

嘴里那苦涩的味道，感觉像是和内心的苦涩产生了共鸣一样

原来借酒是消不了愁的…

秒针还是不停在嘀嗒嘀嗒的转动

我还是独自一人在这孤寂的夜里独自买醉

想起过去，想着现在，想看未来

也许是我想太多…也许是酒精作祟

为了让自己不再清醒，大口的喝下了一杯

带着一丝的酒意，躺在床上

如果这一刻能够有个人在我身边会有多好啊

空虚，寂寞，孤独，悲伤，无助，不安

在这失眠的夜里，一涌而上的把我压得透不过气来

躺在床上，左翻右滚，只能期望着我能够快些入睡

希望那一杯的威士忌能够让我得到短暂的平静

此时此刻，我的脑海已经变得大风大浪

躺在床上，喃喃自语…渐渐的…不再清醒…

My Name Is Khan

2010-07-10T17:35:00.000+08:00

Yes, starring by Bollywood stars, but yet this is a Hollywood movie. A touching, lovely and yet meaningful story which I think should share with everyone. This is especially true for country like Malaysia which is multi racial. A story about love, a story about respect, a story about giving, a story about living...

Khan is just an ordinary man, although born with extra ordinary syndrome, he fight for himself to live in happiness, as a promise to his mom who past away. He is living happily as a Muslim, with his with and son in America, until September 11 where Muslims were all categorized as "terrorist". Besides losing his job, his son were dead being accidentally killed by schoolmates who bully him due to his religion. His wife feels so disappointed and sad, till she says that she regretted for marrying Khan, who is a Muslim. She told him to leave, and in the quarrel, she told Khan that only if he can meet the President of United State and tell him to declare that Muslim are not terrorist, she will not be seeing him again. So Khan set off his long journey, following the foot steps of the President and hoping to grab just a chance to meet with the President. Along his way, he spread his warm heart to people around him, until the end... his wish was finally granted...

Try to understand the story... and after that, try to understand people around you. Please stop any racist act as none of the religion in this world would ask for terror and fear. Stop misinterpreting the words from religious documents. Stop creating chaos at the name of God. Stop misleading people in the name of God. Stop abusing the purity of religion. As this world is only divided by just two different group... good people and bad people... stop being the bad people and start to show your humanity today...

pissed...

2010-07-07T23:01:00.000+08:00

So far so good in my working life... actually not really started to do what I need to do within my job field... still just helping people do this and that, reading some manuals and also helping the company in organizing an event. Getting well with my colleague in my section, while for others... not so. Today should have been a nice day, but my mood were spoil in the morning. I was suppose to replace my colleague to attend the event committee meeting, but I was informed I need to attend a training at the same time as well. I told others who attend the meeting that I will go in a little late after my training which took about 1 hour. But what I get from them is a reaction of "black face"... What? Did I do something wrong? I informed you all ok... some more I just help people to attend... and honestly the meeting can carry on first and what is the big deal? In the end the one who ask me to replace him was forced to attend the meeting. And guess what? After I finish my training, it still haven't my turn to present the progress! So why they want to make such a big deal anyway? It just another routine meeting to update progress and I really have no idea why they want to make it until so chaotic. Keep on blaming people for not getting any good progress and the same time whatever people propose were all banned off... Sigh... suddenly have a feeling that "oh boy, what me and my friends do during University is much better than what they are doing now..." Some more I'm now working for food & beverage and also advertising & promotion section... for both I had been contributing a lot of ideas and quotation from suppliers as well... still no conclusion was drawn because being banned and what so ever. Sigh...

Just hope things wont get any worsen.

Settling down...

2010-07-04T09:53:00.000+08:00

Slowly... bit by bit... life is settling down...
Settling down with working life...
Settling down with my currently daily life...
Settling down with my new friends...
Settling down with my own self...
But still... there are still something that haven't settle down...
Some feelings...
Some emotions...
Some thoughts...
Some problems...
Just hope things will slowly turn right soon...